I was out walking on Wimbledon Common recently after Federer destroyed that English guy, when I noticed two smallish furry creatures arguing. They seemed to be a couple, and the girl-furry-creature was giving out shit to the boy-furry-creature. I only caught a small bit of it, but as I passed, the girl-furry-creature said [...]
The demands from Hyperzenchef are becoming more urgent by the day. Here’s some samples:
1. Can you do something about Ryan Fuckhead Tubridy, he’s an annoying cunt?
2. I accidentally heard the start of smelly cunthead’s so called fucking radio show . It rrrrrrruined the rest of my almost perfect fucking day, send me the cunt’s [...]
Let me just ask you this, if you don’t mind. I’ll just mention this small thing to you that has pissed me off for years, even though by any standards it’s a trivial matter. I know. Trivial is too big a word for it, but still, bear with me.
It’s the selective use of the definite [...]
Just as I mention Hyperzenchef slugging Fanta, something comes back to me about that brand of soft drink. Wasn’t it to do with the Nazis? That’s right, I remember now. As I understand this, Coke had a subsidiary in Germany – Coca-Cola Gmbh – which, inter alia, sponsored Hitler’s 1936 Olympics, where Hitler demonstrated Aryan [...]
Did you see that game tonight between Switzerland and Ukraine? Did you ever see anything so boring in your whole life? I ended up temporarily losing the power to my legs and involuntarily developed a South African accent. A stress accent. Christ Almighty! I fervently hoped they’d all lose. [...]
Somebody asked me if I was going to christen the new kitchen, and I said, yes, I was going to call it “Dermot”.
I think this has great possibilities, and perhaps even has the making of a children’s book: The Adventures of Dermot the Kitchen. What do you think? Maybe they’ll make a movie of it, [...]
The Bullet and myself were bored and went to see the new X-Men movie tonight. Vinnie was in the movie, so this picture of him making friends with Gazza seems appropriate.
Christ, I’m bollixed.
I decided that the only way to get some sort of shape on that goddam kitchen was to invite a gang of scroungers over for grub and liquor, so I set a date for last Saturday and told them I’d be handing out free food. That’s why I haven’t been here much lately: [...]