I’ve been thinking about this recent court case involving the two women who want to be married, and it’s bothering me.
These women, it seems, want to be married like everybody else. To each other.
I pause a long time and I think about this and I have to confess that there are many and varied thoughts rotating around in my brain in a state of controlled turmoil but eventually I come up with an opinion. And the opinion I come up with is:
What’s the problem?
So they want to be married? OK then. Let them be married! What’s the fucking problem?
Well, it seems the High Court thinks a marriage should be between a man and a woman.
Right. Let me think about that, because the High Court deserves a little respect, doesn’t it? Man. Woman. Marriage. Together.
Da. Dee. Da. Dum. Dum-dee-da-dee-dum. Thinking . . . thinking . . . please wait . . .
That’s it. I’ve thought.
It seems to me that the courts have no right to examine a person’s genitalia. It seems to me that marriage is not about reproduction, and I say that for two reasons. Firstly, the country is full of unmarried people producing families, bless them, and secondly, if you make reproduction a criterion for marriage, well what about old fuckers getting married?
Is somebody going to ask the old bride: when was your last period?
Is somebody going to say to the elderly groom: Whip it out there and give it a shake till we see what’s going on with you?
Of course not!!
They won’t have children. They don’t want children. In fact, they can’t have children, and they’re very happy about it, just like the lezzers. So what’s the big deal? Let the lezzers marry, that’s what I say. And let arse-bandits marry too. I have no problem with that, as long as they don’t frighten the piebalds.