The Croke Park Trilogy – Part Five

I nearly forgot to mention this little episode, consumed as I was with the Croke Park thing at the weekend. On Sunday morning before we headed off to Mulligan’s, Wrinkly Paddy produced a full greasy fried breakfast for me.

There ya go, Bock. Line the stomach. Set you up for the day. He seemed a bit uneasy. A bit diffident.

What’s up, Pat?


Yes there is. What’s that behind your back?

Oh, it’s just the newspaper.

Give me a look.

No. There’s no news today. Nothing happened. Anywhere. Nothing at all.

Give me a look!


Give me a fukken look for fuksake!

He feinted to the left. I lunged to the right. Fit Paddy came up with a snarl and swung a vicious roundhouse kick in my direction, but I was too hung-over to respond and the kick overshot its mark. So much for being less drunk: there’s always a downside. He crashed through the glass door to the garden, lacerating himself badly, and a limp object fluttered to the floor at my feet.

I couldn’t believe my eyes.

What’s this?

The newspaper, he groaned as he freed his arse from the giant Venus Fly-trap.

But that isn’t a newspaper, I responded. That’s —-

The Sunday Independent, Paddy completed my sentence for me. I know. But it’s all they had in the shop. I’m sorry. I’m so ashamed of myself.

Don’t be, I chuckled. Look at this headline: Top players to quit if Staunton forced out.

Suddenly, my hangover didn’t feel as bad. I was ready for Mulligans.


Part Six

Part Four

Part Three
Part Two

Part One

kick it on

5 thoughts on “The Croke Park Trilogy – Part Five

  1. Fucking shitbastards. There I was, enjoying your trilogy, and as I scrolled down it was all getting obscured by big grey boxes. Is this some subtle dig at ‘the man’ or is your blog broked?

  2. It isn’t broke. I’d say the photos aren’t coming up on your machine. Maybe your system blocks pics?

  3. Is it true that, instead of being a blundering novice, Staunton really has amazing powers of hypnosis and that’s why he hasn’t been put out of his misery yet?

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