Right. It’s done. I cast my vote, and fun it was too, I can tell you.
Here’s how I dispensed my Single Transferable Vote in order of preference:
1. The Mother Teresa Wasn’t a Thieving Old Con-Artist Party.
2. The Christian Liver-Transplant Party.
3. The Wombles.
5. Arthur Daley
6. Some Man
7. A Burst Eyeball
8. The United Haemorrhoid Front
9. The Brazilian Wax Party
10. Jimmy Hoffa
11. John Donne
12. The Completely Dishonest But Not As Dishonest As This Crowd of Crooks Party.
That should do it.
Tomorrow we have the count, and isn’t it great? Just like the Eurovision, the count is the best bit, and you know what? I feel sorry for people in countries with the first-past-the-post system. I mean, they just have one count, some boodie stands up and says Right! You, you and you, fuck off. Now you! Yes you. You’re elected. Now everybody fuck off home.
Not here in Ireland though. Jesus no. Here we have PR. The most fun system of election in the world. Here we go through count after count, distributing surpluses and watching these miserable stiffs as they sweat through the night, not knowing if they’ve been kicked out of office. Maybe, if we’re lucky, the count might go on into the next day which is even better because the fuckers suffer twice as long. Great.
And to think that this government tried to take all this pleasure away from us. To think they tried to bring in an e-voting system that was not only flawed and full of software bugs, but more importantly, did all this redistributing in the time it takes to say crooked politician bastard.
Anyway, for now, fuck ’em. The Sopranos are back.