A Strange Woman
Posted on Saturday, December 1, 2007A woman comes into my local bar sometimes, at lunch-time, where people are eating, sharing tables, reading the paper.
She doesn’t ask if someone is using that space. She doesn’t ask if maybe someone has gone out to answer the phone, or to smoke, or to deal with a horrible road accident involving the decapitation of their close relative.
No.
She just sits in there beside you.
Close beside you.
So close, you feel uncomfortable, — especially when you notice that she’s rocking slowly back and forth.
Strange.
.o0o.
I’m not a nice person when you don’t let me alone. I’m not an extremely tolerant person.
I’m just not.
Fuck off! Let me alone!
The first time I experienced this woman’s behaviour was in the evening when the bar was empty and I was waiting to meet someone. There was nobody else there, and I was quietly reading my newspaper, when she squeezed in beside me without a word.
Next to me!
Not: Is someone using this seat?
No. At my table!
Not, would you mind if I sat here?
No.
Just the two of us, side by side, very close, in this empty bar with all its empty tables.
Fuck off!!
.o0o.
I’m a small, mean-minded man, and yet for some reason, I neither laughed at, nor attacked, this poor devil. Instead, I recognised that I was dealing with a person who had much bigger problems in life than I have, and I felt sorry for the poor woman.
Did that help me?
No.
I still want to punch her in the mouth. Fuck off and let me read my paper!
Stumble it!
December 1st, 2007
Is she good looking?
December 1st, 2007
Waaahhhaaayyy! Looks like someone’s got a lady fancier. Go on the Bock!
December 1st, 2007
Has anyone else noticed her!!!
December 1st, 2007
Dan: No
Jack : No
Kay: Oh yes!
December 1st, 2007
In the narrative of your life, she may be a messenger. Or a metaphor for, um, something. Or your nemesis or your saviour.
In any event, Bock, I think you pulled!
December 1st, 2007
Well, Sam, if I pulled, so did the other fifty or sixty men and women haunted by this person.
December 1st, 2007
She must have room in her heart for all of you.
December 2nd, 2007
creepy!!!!
Where is this bar?
December 2nd, 2007
You want a creepy experience?
OK, I’ll give you the address, but you’ll have to leave your kirpan at home, just in case.
December 2nd, 2007
Ha Ha!
I do not carry a kirpan dear! I am not a baptized Sikh! I am more of a Chicken and Whiskey boy!
December 2nd, 2007
Sorry Bock, I’ll leave you be from now on.
Dan, I AM GOOD LOOKING (when I have my teeth in)! You can catch me in the Flag or the Windmill most lunchtimes.
December 2nd, 2007
Julie, have you met Jasjeet Singh? I think he’d like to be friends with you.
December 2nd, 2007
Jasjeet,
I’m at Dolan’s tonight for the Fun Lovin’ Criminals gig but I’ll pop out to the bar from time to time. I’ll have my teeth in, just for you! Or maybe you prefer them out?
This could be the start of a beautiful friendship!
December 2nd, 2007
There has been extensive studies done by researchers doing similar acts of invading personal spaces and to record reactions. Maybe she’s a sociologist?
Or just a sad nutter.
December 2nd, 2007
Or a sad, nutty sociologist?
December 3rd, 2007
Something occurs to me Bock. She is not the only strange woman going in there. Jesus, I am sounding like the Duke of Leinster. I know the woman you speak of, pretty weird. We will discount our own women and indeed male friends as they are the weirdos we know and love. I wish your weirdo would apply for membership so she could be blackballed and chucked back out onto the street, where she belongs.
December 3rd, 2007
To paraphrase,
Bock there’s only one thing worse then a strange women sitting down beside you ………….
December 3rd, 2007
Oh dear Jesus
December 3rd, 2007
S&C -
That was terrible!