Vera Duckworth Murdered
Posted on Friday, January 18, 2008
Coronation Street fans were stunned tonight when Corrie stalwart Vera Duckworth died in a hail of bullets.
Viewers watched, sickened, as the door of
the Rover’s Return burst open to reveal a crazed Bobby Fischer, carrying a machine-gun. Without warning, the former World Chess Champion raised his weapon and unleashed a high-velocity barrage of lead at Mrs Duckworth (70).
Though severely wounded, Mrs Duckworth managed to return fire at Fischer (64), hitting him twice in the chest with .44 Magnum slugs and killing him instantly.
Vera died a few moments later, in the arms of her beloved husband, Jack (71) . And so another Coronation Street legend bows out for the last time.
.
Stumble it!
January 18th, 2008
You have ruined my entire nights viewing, Bock.
Are you happy now?
Or maybe it will be different in the repeats?
January 18th, 2008
Fear not, Ancient One. Scientology will save your night’s viewing.
January 18th, 2008
So Tom Cruise is going to jump out of a passing taxi-cab and save them? Because he has to? Wow!
January 18th, 2008
He’s the only one who can.
January 18th, 2008
And then the aliens will come down and take her to Atlantis. Atlantis is actually a nightclub full of strippergram toyboys. Vera likes them. I’ve heard tom does too…..
January 18th, 2008
no no no vera was a member of the scientology movement and the pigeons in jacks loft were actually the space thingys in her head that jack turned into racing pigeons and locked them up to prevent them going back to venus. thats why she was shot. she was shot by the scientologists for not letting the space thingys go even though it wasnt her fault. and by the way tom cruise is to appear in corrie for an episode. he is to play one of ken barlows sons that he never knew about coming to his father to learn how to put the kettle on.
January 19th, 2008
So Corporation Street is still running then? I never knew.
January 20th, 2008
You wait. In a year’s time she’ll come out of the shower and it’ll all have been a dream.
I only wish poor Katie Holmes could be as lucky.
January 20th, 2008
so do you think it could all be a dream
January 20th, 2008
I do Local. A dream with the worst display of earrings in the whole world.
January 21st, 2008
Ah, so that’s how Bobby F. died. I thought it might be something like that. And here they said he died of kidney failure in Iceland. Anything to cover up a conspiracy and a likely story at that–obviously made up.
Uh…thanks for keeping us accurately informed. I shall now post on several popular news site’s forums and tell them the truth of it.