No Heather Mills Jokes, Please

I’m probably going out on a limb here, but the Madeleine McCann post is getting out of hand with bad puns about Heather Mills.  I’m not asking you to bend the knee to me, but I just think it’s in bad taste and inappropriate when we should be trying to put our best foot forward.

So I’m going to ask you now, if you have any more tasteless comments about the Heather Mills legend, leave them here instead.

If we could all toe the line, I’m sure you’ll agree that would be a big step forward.


And no smart comments about this kind of thing:-

21 thoughts on “No Heather Mills Jokes, Please

  1. well……:)
    News reports last year confirmed that Paul McCartney haD separated from his
    wife Heather Mills- McCartney.

    Mrs Mills- McCartney is said to be distraught over the split “He has
    been my crutch for so long!!” She said in an earlier briefing, “I have
    no idea why this has happened, I’m stumped”

    She’s reported to be making frantic efforts to keep the split as civil
    as possible.

    “She’s running around in circles”, according to a close friend, “she
    will need all the support she can get its not like its easy to walk out
    on a relationship like this”

    It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the
    marriage, Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world amassing
    a colossal wealth due to his participation with The Beatles and
    subsequent musical collaborations, if an agreement hasn’t been signed it
    is believed that she won’t have a leg to stand on!

    Rumours abound over the split have suggested that infidelity may have
    been the cause. “She’s terrible” a source stated, “always trying to get
    her leg over”.

    Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the
    cause. “Macca couldn’t handle it anymore” a friend said “he would get
    home at night and find her legless”

    Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present
    that Paul had got prior to the wedding; he gave her a new prosthetic leg
    for Christmas but that was just a stocking-filler. The main gift was a
    plane but then he gave her a Ladyshave for the other leg…

  2. The Venus di Milo wil be turning in her grave with all these disgustingly tasteless puns. Which reminds me of Def Leppard, who you don’t hear much about these days, but their drummer performed remarkably well given his disarming style. And where’s the ‘arm in that?

    By the way, the title of my blog is purely coincidental.

  3. seemingly paul is going to do a reworking of the beatles classic something. it will include a change in lyrics. the opening line will now be, something in the way she moves, tells me one leg is longer than the other

  4. I don’t know. On the one hand everyone is up in arms about the injustice that plagued the McCanns in the press and now it’s Heather Mills turn. Perhaps she is this wanton woman who took poor Paul for a few of his millions, I know your going to say she courted the publicity… brazen hussy. I ask myself what has she ever done to me.

  5. nobody forced him to marry her. He did that all by himself – plus, he didn’t seem to hang around too long after Linda died, before he was getting his leg over again. So, he got a bit of younger crumpet to make him feel good, and she got a shitload of money. Leave em off I say.

  6. Heather Mills appealed to the judge and asked him why people seemed to take such an instant dislike to her. His Honour, tiring of diplomacy, said, “I think you’ll find, Miss Mills, that it saves time!”

    A salutary lesson for Paulie Mac though, I’d say it’ll be some time before he gets down on one knee again!

  7. Her performance outside the court must have sent a shiver down the spine of a lot of men, especially older, richer ones who have hooked up with young tottie. Her naked avarice was stomach churning. She is now stumped, (sorry) she will now be pursued by a gaggle of toyboy reality TV Z list types promising undying loyalty, looking for a piece of the pie and no man with wealth of €30m or more would touch her with a barge pole. Seems to me she will have to confine herself to thrysts with the personal trainer. Her tirade had a resonance, women scorned were badly served by her, their cover is blown.

  8. Yep, she’s ruined it for the rest of the gold diggers…. But equally, he should have waited before old Linda was cold in the grave before looking for a replacement so he made himself look like a bit of a tit as well. Heather is an opportunist and by god did she see him coming. She doesn’t care now what’s thought of her cause she is rich. Pity there’s a poor innocent baby in the middle of it as well though.The real victim. Isn’t Paul stepping out with another lady now? Or is she just a friend?

  9. Gilly, he’ll be wary of going a step too far ever again. If he even looks like making the same mistake his daughter (Stella is it?) won’t be long giving him a good toe in the hole.

    My sympathy for the kid would be more heartfelt if she wasn’t on €45 grand per annum plus godknows what when Paul rejoins the band (or if he ends up in the wrong place -gets Wings). I know money Can’t Buy her Love, but it helps on the Long and Winding Road ….

  10. There was never a divinity in the falling arches of this flat-footed affair.

    Hamstrung from the off, Macca never recognised her obvious Achilles heel until
    in stepped his daughter and only then did he calf.

    She was too thighed up in her own life and really, should have dipped a toe in earlier.

    Millions to anyone who work up something vomity on metatarsal

  11. Such is her notoriety now that she’ll have to change her name …. can I suggest Eileen ?

  12. Sniffle, rumours abound that she’s already chasing another musician – a well heeled Heavy Metatarsal Rocker to boot – and could end up falling for him. According to sources, the guys solicitor is insisting he puts his foot down as she’ll be a shoe-in to sign a pre-nup now that she’s loaded. But he might skip the notion as he thinks it’s a bit lame.

  13. What has happened to Heather. She was son wonderful in the hospital series. She looked good and happy when first met Paul. The, she changed. Her face changed, She had her lips filled out and they looked crooked. She started acting odd. Noticed in an interview shortly before they announced split….she said, Paul wanted all his own way and she was not letting him get it. Why is there a poor child mixed in all this mess and if Heather is “so off” why hasn’t Paul got custody. Poor Bea.

  14. I hear she’s releasing a CD

    # Love Me 24
    # From zero to 24
    # I Want To Hold Your 24
    # 24 Can Buy Me Love
    # A Hard 24 Day’s Night
    # I Feel 24
    # Ticket To Ride 24/7
    # 24 Can Work It Out
    # 24 Yellow Submarines
    # All You Need is 24 million
    # Hello Paul Goodbye Paul
    # Lady Made Money
    # Only One Old Brown Shoe Needed

  15. Heather Mills has been included in the 2008 edition of the Guinness Book of Records. She was the first person in history to successfully milk a beetle!

  16. I did wonder about the crooked lip thing….probably brought on by too much sneering. She’s a nothing, a nobody, and only famous because of the tragic accident she had herself, and Paul of course. No wonder his daughter Stella hated her. You can smell a rat a mile off. She’s talentless and ignorant. But I’m sure that being respected is at the very bottom of her list. She’s loaded!! Biatch

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