Ireland 1 – Cyprus 0
Oct 16th, 2008 | By Bock | Category: SportI’m taking up a new hobby.
I’ve decided to start smashing my face against a rusty six-inch nail while listening to Céline Dion and eating dog-turds soaked in Budweiser.
I think it’ll be fun, compared to watching the Irish international football team, who are now officially beyond a joke.
What the fuck was that? What the fuck is all the celebration about? The cream of our professional footballers somehow managed to hold off Cyprus, in Dublin, before a partisan home crowd. They somehow, bravely, fearlessly, extracted a 1-0 victory from these giants of international football.
And the pundits are celebrating. Celebrating? Cyprus, for fucksake!
Now, admittedly, it isn’t as bad as this humiliation to Cyprus a year ago, where the Irish team were booed off the pitch after losing. It wasn’t that bad, but it’s not like they beat fucking Brazil, is it? They beat Cyprus 1-0 with home advantage, and they were lucky not to concede two goals. I don’t care if they have that old Italian guy, Trapper Tommy, managing them. I don’t care if he’s a big bearded roughneck with a motorbike. No? He’s not? Oh right. I must be thinking of someone else.
Anyway, I don’t care who they have managing them.
They’re fucking shite.
Celine Dion makes me puke. Sorry, Celine I know we were born in the same country and all that happy horseshite, but shite, I can’t stand ya.
Football will kick yer ass sometimes but poetry never will, well at lease not as much and with such fooking regularity.
I’ve given up on Irish soccer. It’s a pain in the fucking arse.
i’m of the opinion that cyprus are a way better side than we gave them credit for. they could have had arrived in dublin with 6 points and left with nine if they had a bit of luck. they conceded a late equaliser against italy and missed a penalty in their last match, against georgia? we on the other hand have had lucky wins against both georgia and cyprus. we still look like a team that will concede goals and lose a match. i wonder if stauton had made that team selection, would the commentators have been celebrating? ok we don’t have the same calibre of players charlton had, but you’d expect the current bunch not to give the ball away so cheaply. not too worry, i’m sure they’ll enjoy the victory in lilles.
You personify fair-weatherosity.
Let’s hope Munster don’t get shit. Pretty fucking unlikely, but you never know, I suppose.
No. I always thought they were shite.
And even though we’re shit Ireland could still qualify. Why? Because the overpaid millionaires playing for big clubs the length and breadth of Europe don’t give a fuck about international football anymore.
That’s why Germany, France and Italy are scraping through every game and the likes of Greece are winning the European Championship.
One of the days (and if last nights fare was anything to go by, le jour de boredom est arrivé) International soccerball will be as entertaining as the fucking Eurovision, only the Armenians, Turks, Poles and Latvians will be arsed about it.
Ugh. Budweiser.
Hoof — Fucking soccerball is even more boring than bogball these days.
Nick — I know. I was only joking about the Budweiser.
Fucking soccerball is even more boring than bogball these days.
You go too far.
I think not. What’s the choice? Thirty muck-savage Guards and primary teachers kicking fuck out of each other, or twenty-two millionaire chavs trying not to get injured.
At least in the bog-ball you might see a decent fight.
I take your point. But:
The chavs are generally easier on the eye than the Guards.
There’s more skill involved in the injury avoidance than in the fuck kicking.
And if you want to watch a fight, I sure there are still one or two establishments whose boardwalks host such events in Limerick. Lord knows there are plenty up here.
I didn’t think the pundits were celebrating. Outrageous isn’t a word I associate with celebration, except of course when said with a twinkle.
My football pundit friends (Liverpool supporters) reckoned it was a ‘great’ display by Ireland and that Trapattoni had worked ‘wonders’ with the team.
My opinion differed in that I pointed out that we were still achieving somewhat similar results when McCarthy and Kerr were in charge and it will be only a matter of time before we head yet again on the downward spiral.
They deemed me a fool. We’ll see.