Denying the Economic Crisis

Yesterday upon the stair, I saw a man who wasn’t there.
He wasn’t there again today. I wish that he would go away.

That’s how I feel at the moment.

Everywhere I look, I see something that isn’t there, like we all used to when were kids.  Mad fuckers with fangs on their foreheads hiding under the bed waiting to grab your ankle.  Crazy, hairy bastards hiding behind the curtain, ready to jump out and bite your feet off when the light goes out.

Of course, as every child knows, the crazed mad fucker can’t come out and tear off your eyeballs as long as you pretend he isn’t there.  He’s powerless until you talk to him, or talk about him, or worst of all, peep under the bed.

Every child knows that, and so, it seems, does our government.

Every day that passes brings worse economic news, but the fucking government won’t talk about it.  They’re bringing in an emergency budget at the end of the month, which means they’re going to take every penny you have, and a few you don’t possess, but they won’t say why.

I understand that.  I understand perfectly why these men and women are afraid to say what might happen if it all goes arse-over-tit.  You see, they might be dressed up in ill-fitting adult-man suits and bad mother-of-the-bride grown-up-women outfits, but beneath it all, they’re just the same as the rest of us.  Children playing pretend.

Tell us a story instead.

All right then, I’ll give you a rhyme.

There’s been an accident, they said.

Your servant’s cut in half . He’s dead!

Is he indeed?  And will you please

Bring me the half that has my keys.

Oh how we chuckle as the beast behind the curtain grinds its teeth and shifts weight from one bunioned foot to the other.

Children, our government of pretend adults.  Frightened children who don’t understand why a strange family has moved into their playroom. Or why their parents look so scared. Or why the car is gone.  Or why they have to move into a cheap hotel.  Or why the neighbours are saying those things about them.

Tell us another story.

All right then.  Would you like to hear another nice poem about a horrible demise?

Yes please.

Very well.

Little Willie from the mirror

Licked the mercury right off,

Thinking in his childish error

It would cure the whooping cough.

At the funeral, his mother brightly said to Mrs Brown

‘Twas a chilly day for Willie when the mercury went down!

They don’t understand, they don’t know what to do about it, and they’re afraid, because there’s no Mammy or Daddy to make everything all right this time.

They’re all hoping the fat kid with the glasses will know what to do.  What about one final rhyme concerning horrible expiration?  Thanks to Mr Belloc for this one.

A python I should not advise,
It needs a doctor for its eyes,
And has the measles yearly.

However, if you feel inclined
To get one (to improve your mind,
And not from fashion merely),

Allow no music near its cage;
And when it flies into a rage
Chastise it most severely.

I had an Aunt in Yucatán
Who bought a Python from a man
And kept it for a pet.

She died because she never knew
These simple little rules and few;–
The snake is living yet.

It seems appropriate.  The Snake.  Wasn’t that what they used to call the exchange-rate mechanism thirty years ago, when they were laying the ground for the Euro?

Let’s hope it doesn’t devour us for our stupidity and corruption.

Meanwhile, a floorboard creaks.

Pic  © Achilles

4 thoughts on “Denying the Economic Crisis

  1. A flock of Obsks
    From down in Nobsks
    Hiked up to Bobsks
    To look for jobsks

    Then back to Nobsks
    With sighs and sobsks
    There were, in Bobsks,
    No jobsks for Obsks.

    Dr. Seuss.

  2. I try not to despair but BOCK, but thankfully you put forth hope by your posts where hope should not be.

    However, I really do think Willie Nelson’s idea to get the land in ‘his’ country working again has more going for it than is immediately apparent.
    It could be applied worldwide.

  3. Let me quote the great Al Wilson…

    On her way to work one morning
    Down the path along side the lake
    A tender hearted woman saw a poor half frozen snake
    His pretty colored skin had been all frosted with the dew
    “Oh well,” she cried, “I’ll take you in and I’ll take care of you”
    “Take me in oh tender woman
    Take me in, for heaven’s sake
    Take me in oh tender woman,” sighed the snake

    She wrapped him up all cozy in a curvature of silk
    And then laid him by the fireside with some honey and some milk
    Now she hurried home from workthat night as soon as she arrived
    She found that pretty snake she’d taking in had been revived

    Now she clutched him to her bosom, “You’re so beautiful,” she cried
    “But if I hadn’t brought you in by now you might have died”
    Now she stroked his pretty skin and then she kissed and held him tight
    But instead of saying thanks, that snake gave her a vicious bite

    “I saved you,” cried that woman
    “And you’ve bit me even, why?
    You know your bite is poisonous and now I’m going to die”
    “Oh shut up, silly woman,” said the reptile with a grin
    “You knew damn well I was a snake before you took me in
    “Take me in….

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