Blasphemous Libel

The economy has collapsed. The world is on the brink of disaster. The country is bankrupt. So what do you think our government is devoting its energies to?

Blasphemy, that’s what.

As part of the Defamation Bill, the minister for justice has seen fit to introduce the crime of blasphemous libel.

According to the bill, A person who publishes or utters blasphemous matter shall be guilty of an offence and shall be liable upon conviction on indictment to a fine not exceeding €100,000.

And what exactly is blasphemous matter?

It’s anything grossly abusive or insulting in relation to matters held sacred by any religion, thereby causing outrage among a substantial number of the adherents of that religion; and he or she intends, by the publication of the matter concerned, to cause such outrage.

Got that?

If you cause outrage among a substantial number of adherents of a religion, you can be fined up to €100,000 for committing blasphemous libel.

We don’t know what a substantial number is. We don’t know what outrage means. We don’t even know what a religion is.

But still, if you say something that pisses off a bunch of religious lunatics, no matter how crazy they are, you can be found guilty of blasphemy.

If you laugh at Scientologists, and they feel outraged, you’re a criminal. Or to put it another way, your guilt or innocence depends on how sensitive some lunatic is.

If nobody is offended, you’re not a criminal. If some bunch of nutcases get worked up about what you said, then you are a criminal. It all depends what the nutters think.

How’s that?

A charter for fucking maniacs to rule the country.

If you say that the Prophet shouldn’t have been having sex with a seven-year-old girl, and a substantial number of Muslims are outraged by your opinion, you’re a criminal.

If you say, No. An alien from Venus doesn’t live inside your head, and enough Scientologists complain, you’re a criminal.

If you say Jesus doesn’t turn into a biscuit, and some bunch of ultra-right nutbags complain, then you’re a criminal.

Here are some people you can’t laugh at anymore:

– Jehovah Witnesses who’d let their children die rather than give them a blood transfusion.

– Scientologists, members of a worldwide money-grabbing scam, who think a How Sexy Are You? machine is the key to salvation and that your head is full of space creatures.

– Mormons who believe that the restoration of the ten tribes of Israel will take place in America and that Joseph Smith translated the Book of Mormon from golden plates that were buried by the prophets near New York, and that he was told about them by the Angel Moroni.

– Muslims who believe that young couples should be stoned to death for eloping and that a suicide bomber will end up in Heaven with 72 virgins.

In future, you won’t be permitted to say that you think any of this is nonsense, in case you cause outrage. If the editor of Jyllands-Posten lived in Ireland instead of Denmark, he could be prosecuted for publishing those cartoons of the Prophet that caused such outrage around the world. If Salman Rushdie lived in Ireland, he’d be a criminal for writing the Satanic Verses.

This is a classic Irish governmental fudge.

Article 40 of the constitution states as follows: The publication or utterance of blasphemous, seditious, or indecent matter is an offence which shall be punishable in accordance with law.

Now, rather than amend this anachronistic provision, placed there by the authoritarian Catholic de Valera and the even more authoritarian John Charles McQuaid, the minister has decided to place into law a ludicrous criminalisation of legitimate discourse. He’s making it a crime to ridicule any belief, no matter how insane. This is a charter for every mad fundamentalist in the world.

Send for the lunatics. The asylum is under new management.



Natural Selections

Defamation Bill 2006

37 thoughts on “Blasphemous Libel

  1. Mary Magdalene was not a hooker, she and the late JC were an item. The pope didn’t want us to know that JC liked nookie so they dissed his bird.

    PS I’m trying to raise €100k just in case, any doners?

  2. Pope Gregory referred to Mary as a peccatrix, a sinner or unchaste woman. What she did for a living is of no interest to me, who am I to judge. My point is that most myths have become accepted truths with no factual basis and to argue against them leaves you open to a fine of €100k.

  3. The Jesus to biscuit thing is fucking ridiculous and Tom Cruise is a complete shithead.There.I said it and I don’t have 100k.What happens next?

  4. The Angel Moroni?? Was he Irish or Italian or just a moron?
    Shit now I suppose I’ll have tp cough up 100k.

  5. There’s a time to sow and a time to reap. A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

    Which ‘time’ is this?

  6. What am I going to do with all my God Is A Cunt t-shirts? And the Jesus Sucks The Rigid Cock Of Satan merchandise I invested all my money in?

  7. This is PC combined with OCD which is probably a fairly accurate summary of Government activity at the moment! – Manic behaviour looking for affirmation from the lunatic fringe!

  8. Unstranger, – time you stopped listening to 60s stuff I reckon.

    Mary Magdalene was on the game according to one of the Gospels. But the other Gospels have no mention of same.

    Some historians write that the disciples were jealous of Magdalene because Jesus appeared to like her – was he giving her one? Hence, they tried to blacken her name by implying that she was a hooker.

    One historian even compared Magdalene to Yoko Oh’No and Jesus to Lennon, arguing that the rest of the disciples (the Beatles) hated her because of her undue influence on the leader of the band….. Sorry Paul, if only you hadn’t written that froggy song.

    They were just jealous guys, so to speak.

    This argument is all very well up to a point – that point being that the vast majority of people on this planet want to kill Oh’No for no apparent reason other than it appears to be a good idea at any given time of the day.

    No one can explain this homicidal compulsion. But it is entertained by all right thinking people.

  9. Stop the fucking bus,i want to get they really want a riot outside dail eireann?

    because they seem to be adding things every month with the sole purpose of creating a mob…

  10. Right welcome to the end of your world as you know it. Britain has seen where religious tolerance has led, you have people in the street calling for the murder of people because they are good at art, I mean fuckit. If you go to a muslim country your wife/ girlfriend/ sister has to cover up, walk behind / in front? all that shit. They blow up statues that are thousands of years old of Buddha I mean Buddha and apparently he is a harmless enough old character. Religious tolerance ain’t all that high but here you bend over!
    The likes of the small fella have constituents dying in hails of bullets and this is the Law he is drafting. Helicopters patrol the skies of a small town with armed police driving around and we have to be worried if you tell a joke in a pub. What the fuck do all the Celtic fans do now? How do they channel their hate?
    I give up

  11. Jeeeeeesus…. ermmm I mean.. Jeeeebus…. So based on their logic in the Dail now, I could set up a ‘religion’ tomorrow (how does one formally establish a religion in the eyes of Fianna Fudge) – anyhow, I could establish a religion worshiping, I dunno, Twink or breakfast rolls from the garage on the M50 or someone/thing…

    Convince a couple of my pals to say they worship the same as me, and then troll the interweb for someone to utter a disparaging word – bang, $100k & a criminal record, mate.

    Where would the money go? Pay off the money the state sponsored certain religious orders for their pedophile crimes…?

    The mind boggles.

  12. Just as an add on here I didn’t realize that this stemmed from a UN resolution, it is ironic that while the resolution was passed to condemn anti-Islamic rhetoric, the Qur’an forbids such action be taken. While ethically condemning blasphemy five times, ultimately the Qur’an instructs man to avoid such company until they change their behavior. I mean this legislation is actually anti-Islamic.

    Only in Ireland ( Or the UN)

  13. There is a friend of mine who has a certificate declaring him a Bishop of the Church of Jesus Christ of tax evasion. I kid you not. American of course!

  14. Hah the Celtic fans Rob, and what about Rangers fans singing at the Celts, “the famine is over why don’t you go home” and the Bhoys replying “the Reformation is over why don’t you head back to Rome”. And there we were thinking they were were incapable of emphasising the historical/religious significance of their annual re-inactments of the “Battle of the Boyne, which of course King Billy, who was a steamer, won. But of course the Bhoys won the European Cup, an altogether more grander achievement indeed.

    Gary, – didn’t didn’t Jesus chase the tax collectors and the solicitors out of a synagogue in Jerusalem – with an ash plant, always a good start. And what point am I making? I really don’t know.

  15. I think Rob is correct, this stems from the UN, the tower of Babel
    of monumental fuck ups. It may have roots in the recent outburst by Roy Keane lookalike
    and Iranian chief, President I’mmadandbad. At a recent UN conference the ex Black Cats boss started ranting about the Jews, surprise surprise. A few nations walked out.What did
    they expect? That he’d be reading from the Torah and enquiring as to what exactly Leopold Bloom was doing meandering across Dublin that day in Ulysses.

  16. I must drag out my copy of the god delusion to verify this but I read that some of the gospels were considered too much for the simple folk and were put aside.
    One mentions where jesus as a teenager got pissed off with his mates and tuned some of them into rabbits or donkeys or whatever.
    Very believable stuff these days.

    Blasphemy me arse. Give ’em hell.

  17. There is no other head of the Church but the Lord Jesus Christ. Nor can the Pope of Rome, in any sense, be head thereof; but is that Antichrist, that man of sin, and son of perdition, that exalts himself, in the Church, against Christ and all that is called God.

    How’s that for ‘Up yours McQuaid?’

  18. Sorry, previous comment posted before finished.

    All it needs to wreck the proposals is for people to post the stuff the churches say about each other – the above is from the Westminster Confession of Faith.

  19. Bock, prayer is the last refuge of the damned. Considering the monumental cock up that FF has made of this country then prayer may be their only hope. No harm in defening all relegions in case one can deliver.
    Another strategy could be to fine everyone that blasphems. This could be the money saver the public finances need. Imagine the money raised at a GAA game….”For jaysus sake, what the fuck was that for ref”… one half of Limerick hurling alone we would have enough to pay off the national debt.
    Finally, this could be a great way to have your family and enemies imprisioned. We are heading into Spanish Inquisition 2, but this time the role of Tomás de Torquemada is being filled by our own Brian C in a spandex thong and nipple clamps.

  20. I didn’t know about Article 40 of the constitution. Interesting.
    This completely useless law proposal by the wankers in power seems to be to be just a diversionary tactic. Work everybody up about that and perhaps they’ll forget about all the other incompetence, corruption etc. That gives you some idea of what Irish politicians think of the average Irish persons intelligence and memory. And based on what, the fact that they voted for them..hhmmm…
    It also occurs that may be just a way of ridiculising the constitution.
    Ya see lads, tis fuckin insane this aul bit of paper. Sure wouldn’t ye be much better off voting yes to the Lisbon Treaty when it comes back around then puttin up with this type of nonsense.
    Problem, Reaction, Solution, though I’m not sure I’m willing to credit the government that level of subtility or intelligence.

    In the worse case scenario we should all just set up an atheist church and bring charges against anyone who tries to use this law, on the grounds that we find it grossly abusive or insulting to our beliefs.

    There’s been alot of ‘back to the 80’s’ talk of late but I fear we may be headed back alot further then that. Following this proposal I’ll be waiting for the goveernments next solution to the underfunded education system, Industrial schools.

  21. i mean, jesus was considered blasphemous in his time. a gospel claims jesus drove the seven devils out of mary magdalene in exorcism. but it doesn’t indicate that she was a prostitute. i think, though im not sure, that pope gregory declared that she was, probably because he was a man and wanted more of a reason to keep women as an underclass. fucker. the islamic extremists blowing up buddha is certainly blasphemy in action. in actuality, the Islamic cause is blasphemous, as they have declared jihad against anyone who isn’t muslim and believe that we are wrong, ignorant sinners who deserve to die. well if i deserve to die because i don’t believe in female multilation and marrying ten year olds and drowning girls in swimming pools then kill me. this government is pathetic. they can’t even solve our real problems so they create more. another money racket. god did not create religion. man did. buddhism is the closest thing to true spirituality as it declares itself a way of life, not a religion.

  22. To the truly religious, everything is both sacred and silly – including blasphemy.

    What a howler, though. It does seem like a diversionary tactic, as C’est La Craic says.

  23. i suppose the truth hurts. let me re-phrase. mary magdalene was not said to be a sinner, but a woman who had seven devils exorcised out of her by jesus. Pope gregory said that donkey’s years ago. Jesus was considered blasphemous in his time. Blowing up buddha is certainly blasphemy against another religion. how mad. declaring holy war against people because they don’t believe what you want them to believe is off the rock. this gov. is pathetic they can’t even solve our real problems so they are making more. Buddhism is the closest thing to a spiritual life, in my opinion, as it declares itself a way of life, not a religion. god didn’t create religion anyway, man did. If my spirituality could be put into colour, it would probably look like 5 different play-doh’s mashed together. The legacy of catholicism gone wrong….

  24. This incredible, I thought you were off your face or something when I read this, until I read elsewhere that they are actually planning to do this. Amazing. Not just the principle of the thing, drastically restricting freedom of speech in a so-called Republic, but the shoddy implementation as well: it seems they wont even be defining religion, so you could, say, declare that you have started your own religion, and this holds, say, raping children, to be a sacred act, and that it is blasphemy to say anything disrespectful about it. From what I can gather this law would apply to this religion as much as Catholicism or any of the others. Its amazing, even for this shower of c*nts.

  25. declare that you have started your own religion, and this holds, say, raping children o be a sacred act, and that it is blasphemy to say anything disrespectful about it
    © Roman Catholic Church

  26. There is no G-d but Allah and Muhammad is his Messenger – call Rowan Williams, the Chief Rabbinate and the Pope, this just might be blasphemous.

  27. For a good overview of various issues regarding Blasphemy, See

    Says there: “from blaptein, “to injure”, and pheme, “reputation”.

    Also: “The Qur’an also states that it is blasphemy to claim … that Jesus Christ (the son of Mary) is the son of God (5.017).”

    So all Christians are Blasphemers. Doesn’t encourage much friendliness.

    Also: “In a broader sense, blasphemy is irreverence toward something considered sacred or inviolable.”

    So if a person’s atheism is sacred or inviolable, it’s blasphemy for anyone to defame it. Especially if one has a strong “faith” in their atheistic beliefs, like theists have in theirs.

  28. Heads up!!

    They’re trying to distract us with this shite while they work on something dark and dirty on the sly, like the introduction of taxes on blinking maybe.

  29. “seven devils” actually refers to a poison used at the time and its 7 deadly ways of killing you. thats what he cast out of her, a poison.

  30. Its kind of frightning to tell you the truth. Fianna Fail were the ones who help the church get an iron grip on this society and countless crimes against women, men and children followed. I just wonder if they’re trying to get another grip on us. The Catholic Church even instigated the invasion of Ireland and took the side of the British during the famine. I really wouldn’t put anything past those fuckers.

    Anyway. I think Tommy Tiernan probably won’t be back on the Late Late in a hurry.

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