Sex Question

Shocking dilemma

Women visitors can take a breather here because I already know the answer.  This one goes out to all our  straight male readers.

If your life was depending on it,  with a gun to your head and an evil genius about to blow up your home town with terrible explosive stuff, who would you choose to have sex with if you were given an appalling choice  that would save your family and friends, between

Mary Harney

mary-harney

and Elvis?

29 thoughts on “Sex Question

  1. Wait, it looks like there’s a catch to this question -there’s something wrong with the way the dilemma is being posed but it’s too late and I’ve had one glass of shiraz too many to figure it out. Might I suggest Sharon Corr as an alternative…?

  2. It depends which family members, but assuming i loved or atleast liked them i wouldn’t give it a second thought. I’d dig elvis and ride him rotten. I could go on and give you reasons why i wouldn’t have sex with mary harney but they’d be all too obvious to most people, the major one being you’d have to search through layers of fat to find her genitalia like she was a filing cabinet. Mary Harney: “I believe it’s filed under F largeladd, or maybe it’s C, if it’s C it should be there next to my conscience that’s if i still have one there”.

  3. hmmmm…The King vs BurgerKing eh? Ya never know tho..The Minister for Chips might secretly be a ‘Hulk a Hulk of Burning Love”…

  4. Harney!… but not sex as ya know it,….yeehaw!!! (there’d be a see thru weather balloon involved!…I’ll say no more though)

  5. Harney, without a doubt.

    In fact I might have already…. If anybody is talking to Mary , can they ask her was she in the corner of Termites on a Thursday night in the first week of November 1990, supping a can of Bud? And if she was, can I have my superman kacks back?

  6. Would you have to tell anyone afterwards??
    I mean…could I do her and pretend I had a flattie??
    A flattie for a fatie

  7. Bock stay off the lighter fluid. It’s bad for your liver. Sweet Jesus what a question! I shall have to go now and throw up again.

  8. At least with Harney you could stick it in any wrinkle and slap her arse. The ripples would do all the work.

  9. Given that choice I would tell the guy with the gun to squeeze the fuckin trigger and get it over with.Cos after taking either alternative I would lose the will to live anyway.So I will adopt the Japanese atitude that it is better to die with honour than live with disgrace.

  10. The logistics of the Harney option are mind-boggling. I mean how would you know where to enter? (Fart and give us a clue there Mary). Or just find a fold somewhere and get busy. The hollow, slapping noise would come back to haunt you for a long time though.

    Elvis is a skeleton by now, so I’m not sure if that even qualifies as gay.

    Jeez, it a tough one.

  11. I’d almost certainly finish up dead, then I really don’t think – even under the dire circumstances you describe – I could get it up.

  12. On “mature” reflection, definitely the guitar. Thanks Hoof!
    Now can we get down to some serious biz?
    Come on Bock, which?

  13. I have found an out to your curious dilemma, oral sex.

    the question is who would give it, ah god i think i’d still have to go with the King,

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