Seasonally Transmitted Diseases
Office party blues
The phone rang.
It was my lawyer, Gonad, howling in agony.
Gonad, I said. What the hell is wrong with you?
I’m in pain, he groaned.
Indeed, I said. What’s wrong?
I caught one of those new mutant STDs, he grunted. Spectroclap. Jesus it hurts. Oh God it fucking hurts. Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!!
I heard about them, I told him. There’s the purple gonborrhea, and the green herpes.
Yes, he gasped. I went to an office party last week, and you know how it goes. Drink. Photocopier room. Oh God!
You sound like you’re in serious pain, Gonad.
I am, he said. I’m screaming with the white syphilis.
______________
More from Gonad.
Nicely put BOCK!
Clearly a job for …. Rubberman!
I’m screaming with the white syphilis.
i had to read the line twice and then it was: OH MY GOD!!!!! *insert loud guffaws and spilled drink*
that was too funny! well done, sugar! xoxoxo
Savannah, lose the ” sugar”, it’s really old.
Servers the fucker right. Office parties indeed! He should have been on his bended knees praying to all the God’s for forgiveness for becoming a poxey lawyer in the first place.
Paulo1 — Mind your manners.
:¬) bock!
@Sav; hey hon, nice to see you in my town SUGAR!
(Some people just don’t get it!)
xoxoxo
He’s Canadian. What do you expect?
better
This is probably the nice and low-toned post on which to introduce news of this apparition, which can also double as a friendly reminder re the recommended preventive against the “purple gonborrhea” and its assorted nasty friends.
Enjoy the season.
Oh you dirty racial profiler you. I told you before, I live in Canada but I’m as Irish as you profess to be ! And pointing out that saying ‘ sugar’ in every comment ( and not just to your blog) is getting old should be construed as helpful criticism and not bad manners. And I wouldn’t know a high horse if I rode in on one. However if you peeked into your stable I would be surprised if you didn’t spot a small herd of them saddled up and ready to go.
Kindly show respect to other posters here and keep your opinions about their writing style to yourself.
So, hey, Bock – did you check out my link?
Poor guy…tell him to it in Tetra Delta…it’s great for the white spots on the dick.
Thanks for a great year Bock…keep up the good work.
M
Scotlyn — Yes indeed. The BVM would have interceded for him if only he’d had faith.