Ireland’s 300 Richest

 Posted by on March 30, 2010  Add comments
Mar 302010

I noticed that none of the usual suspects in here are included in Ireland’s top 300 rich list as published in today’s papers.

Why is this?

The list includes a raft of business men in the top fifty. Most of them are up to their tonsils in debt and are probably on their way to prison.

Cavan tycoon Sean Quinn is at number one. However, it is reported that the man that would never bet more that 50c at cards has dropped an estimated €2.5bn because of outrageous investments (gambling) in Anglo Irish Bank shares.

U2, who are worth €595 million, are in 15th spot, one place behind Limerick’s JP McManus, who’s down to his last €635m.

Beef Baron Larry Goodman – I thought he was dead? – is worth €425m and is in 22nd place.

Super hoofer Michael Flatley – The Lord of the Dance, or the  Lard of the Dance as The Sun dubbed him when he became a fat bastard a few years back, is at 33 with a cool €300m stashed away, while the man that opened up Europe to dirt free air travel, Michael O’Leary, is at 36 with €285m.

Flatley, who claims that he was once a boxer, is in number two spot in the ten richest celebrities table behind U2. Enya, meanwhile, has earned a cool €95m from her cosmic/Gaelic airy fairy codology. She’s at  4.

The highest place actor is Liam Neeson (€55m) at 6, while the completely talentless Chris de Burgh and Westlife are at 8 and 9.

The Cranberries, who are reported to be worth €41 million, are not included in the celebrity top ten even though de Burgh – worth €38m is?

Publishing a top 300 rich list might appear to be a bit, er, rich in the teeth of a recession, but what harm to have an auld blast on the violin whilst the place is going up in flames.

But how about a “They Haven’t a Pot to Piss In” list of top 300 paupers. I’d be in the top ten straight off.

Meantime, good to know that Limerick woman Dolores McNamara has more loot than de Burger and Westlife, given what they’ve  put us through down through the years.

And all she ever did for it was buy a ticket for the EuroMillions lottery on her way to the Black Battery for a drink.

Speaking of the Black Battery, there was a photograph in the local paper a few years back of four men inside the bar standing around a high stool solemnly pointing at it.

And why were they pointing at the chair you may ask? Why the actor Tom Cruise was passing through town and he stopped off in the bar looking for directions to the Dublin Road and he sat on that stool.

Not just any stool now, but THAT stool, the one they were pointing at with a look of awe on their faces. Tom was there for a few minutes and then left after going to the toilet. He may have left two stools behind him in fact, but there was no pic of the alleged other stool on the front page of the local.

Top Gun Star Leaves Outrageous Looking Stool in Black Battery Toilet, could have been the headline.

Tom is worth a few bob also, but there was no way he was investing it in Anglo Irish Bank.

  10 Responses to “Ireland’s 300 Richest”

Comments (10)

    Michael flatly worth 300m from irish dancing you have to respect anybody that can make a living out of what is at best a hobby for most involved in it.


    Well LL, he did sex it up. Boxing and dancing have a lot in common anyway. Just look at Sugar Ray. He was like Nijinsky. Meantime, before Flately Irish dancers looked like as if they were paralysed from the waist up.

    Can anyone out there do the Siege of Limerick, or its that the Walls of Limerick and the Siege of Ennis?


    Maybe, Cruise,a rich, tightfisted, reactionary scientologist was on a mission impossible to convert Dolores to his dodgey sect .I wouldn’t be surprised what he might leave behind in The Black Battery for he has surely become a shit actor. Sure, no risky Anglo investments for tight arse Tom,no tips either.He might leave a stool but wouldn’t give you the steam off his piss.


    My Nana drinks in the Black Battery.

    Or she used to. Then it all got a bit ‘glam’ for her and her coven.


    Bock-“Tom is worth a few bob also, but there was no way he was investing it in Anglo Irish Bank.”

    And he’s a Scientologist!


    @seconds he done more than sex it up. I’m a fan of pro wrestling and there’s nothing more boring than most of the women wrestlers and they’re shit hot, but on the other hand give me a solid match between chris benoit, kurt angle or eddie geurrero and it’s an art form.


    Rich List and no sporting icons? Saw this today ,

    When you were slaving away with Deportiva la Coruna earning pesos , you coulda been slugging it out in NY, playing rounders and making real mullah.


    That’s fair money Mr Sniffle. Roy Keane is worth 22m by the way. How much do you reckon that Bayern Munich bloke who slammed home the injury time winner last night is on Mr Sniffle?


    I’d be inclined to hold back a couple a bob from Patrice Evra’s pay packet this week – not too much though, yer man Olic was lightening.

    Meanwhile back in Wayne’s world, I pray heavily this Spy Wednesday evening, imploring the deity to have him ready for Sunday’s Theatre of Dreams redemption .

    I’ve offered to do His crucifixion if He could only spare Wayne’s ankle or tendon or metatarsal.

    Last night was about the beautiful game Mr Out, but not as I know it.

    It was sorta sad to see Scholsie getting caught out and whatever happened to Michael Carrick?

    & Ji Sung needs to liquidise more frogs.

    Tonight football will be the winner at the Emirates and then go back home to Barca.

    What that list didn’t mention was lill Lionel’s last year’s earnings of €32.9 Millions.

    Worth every penny.


    He’s some man is Lionel. And Wayne could have played for Ireland. Chelski won’t be answering your prayers.

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