Irish Government Ministers — Update

 Posted by on March 24, 2010  Add comments
Mar 242010
 

This is an update of an earlier post, following the recent shuffle.

Here’s the latest list of mumbling, shuffling gobshites we call our government.

Willie got the boot for making unfounded allegations about an election candidate and for giving false information to the High Court, and has been replaced in the meaningless position by by the ever-friendly Tony Killeen.

Mary Coughlan, Tánaiste, half-wit and full-time minister for cursing has swapped places with windbag Batt O Keeffe, and now we have a total fool charge of education.

Mary Hanafin, rabid religious right-winger, replaces Martin Cullen in charge of culture, sports and tourism.

éamonn ó Cuiv has been moved from Craggy Island and put in charge of Social Protection.  I don’t know what this s but it might involve handing out condoms in pubs.

What difference does it make?  Little enough.  Same fools, different day.

Name and Title Commentary
Brian Cowen

Taoiseach

(Prime minister)

Gobshite

Qualifications: lawyer

Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none
Business experience: none

Mary Coughlan

Tánaiste (Deputy prime minister)

Education & Skills

Self-important, overbearing fool

Qualifications: Sociology degree
Former social worker

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Brian Yehudi Lenihan

Minister for Finance

Son of former minister.

Qualifications: lawyer.

Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none
Business experience: none

No financial expertise. Ideal man to handle financial crisis.

Mary Harney

Health Minister

Failed ideologue

Qualifications: Arts degree
Former teacher

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

John Gormley

Environment Heritage and Local Government

Green party leader.  No discernible personality.

Qualifications; Arts degrees.

Former teacher.

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Noel Dempsey

Transport minister

Thug.  Opus Dei stooge.

Qualifications: Arts degree

Former teacher.

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Dermot Ahern

Justice minister

Bombast and bully.

Qualifications: Lawyer.
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none
Business experience: none

Micheál Martin

Foreign minister

Cynic. Smart enough to know better.

Qualifications:

Arts degrees.
Former teacher.

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Mary Hanafin

Tourism, culture and sports

Religious maniac. Demented.

Qualifications: Arts degree
Former teacher

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Éamonn Ó Cuiv

Social Protection

Prick. Detested by constituents.

Qualifications: BSc.
Business experience: pathetic. Former island co-op manager.
Technological expertise: none.
Managerial expertise: laughable.

Pat Carey

Community, Equality and Gaeltacht Affairs

Former Chief Whip

Qualifications: Arts degree
Primary teacher

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Tony Killeen
Defence minister
Affable, popular across party divisions.

Qualifications: Arts degree
Former primary teacher

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Éamonn Ryan

Communications, Energy and Natural Resources minister

Pampered, condescending, smug fool

Qualifications: none

Business experience: Minimal. Former travel agent
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Brendan Smith

Agriculture, Fisheries and Food

Out-of-depth fool.

Qualifications: economics degree

Former political adviser.

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

Batt O Keeffe

Enterprise, Trade & Innovation minister

Waffling gobshite

Qualifications: Arts degree

Former lecturer.

Business experience: none
Technological expertise: none
Managerial expertise: none

  25 Responses to “Irish Government Ministers — Update”

Comments (25)
  1.  

    Jesusgodalfuckingmighty!
    And we’re supposed to trust this shower? God help this country, these fuckwits certainly can’t.

  2.  

    Fuck God. He can’t help us either. We can only help ourselves. However, the system is so gnarled, corrupt, self-serving, immovable, undentable, self-destroying, corrupt (did I say that already), that none of us have the fucking energy. They are all the same, and have so completely walled themselves into the fucked up Irish political system that we can’t get them out, and we can’t even change it around them. The country is utterly fucked for at least the next 20 years, and as a young man I should be furious, resilient, determined, dynamic etc etc. I should be pushing for change, and hopeful of getting it. Instead, I am demoralised, hopeless, cynical, bitter, impoverished, betrayed, and off to the airport and the first flight out. The best and brightest of my generation are coming with me.

  3.  

    For O’Cuiv the commentary might be extended to include: Dev’s grandson, a fact he tries to underline by wearing his granddad’s glasses. :-)

  4.  

    Well listening to Ben Dunne on Newstalk this morning, he said that if this lot are left doing what they’re doing, then the IMF will be running the country before the end of the year.

    I have no particular grá for him, but I’d believe him before I’d believe any of those “the recession will end in 3 months” chancers!

  5.  

    Talk about re-arranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. If me man out of Shameless was running the gov we
    be better.

  6.  

    more teachers than half the schools in Ireland. Has any of them other than Eamonn Ryan, ever done a days work in the private sector.

  7.  

    How do you know Dempsey is a thug and in Opus Dei? I always laugh when you call him that. I think you went easy on Lenihan, I think he is the most dangerous of the lot of them. A man who knows nothing about economics and is very ill. He really should not be where he is for his own sake and the country’s.

  8.  

    Every teacher I know is in mourning for Batt, and Batt is detested as an idiot with no clue at all about Education.
    Mary Coughlan is worse.
    Our two most important Departments – enterprise and education – are still being run by fools, they just did a swop. Why? They are both loyal to Brian Cowen who day by day is being unveiled as a very naked Emporer.

    I don’t mind teachers per se being TDs, but this lot are not the pick of the teachers.
    An Arts degree is a very general degree.
    Primary teachers have a Degree in Education at least.
    One third of teachers now hold a Masters degree (source: Professor in UCC to me).
    A good number of teachers now hold Doctorates.
    This lot “did” the bare minimum.
    They are having us on.
    We are taking it.

  9.  

    That old Limerick foible surfacing again, eh ? Brian Yehudi Lenihan.

  10.  

    I must be missing the Limerick connection.

  11.  

    Throwing the “Jew ” label around. Father Creagh & all that.

  12.  

    You got the wrong handle on that, my friend, and if you don’t mind me saying so, a small bit offensively. Well done. That’s the spirit.

    Do I really have to spell out the reference for you? I’m disappointed.

  13.  

    Fiddles? While Rome burns? Nifty.

  14.  

    I’m glad you got to that.

  15.  

    It’s amusing that lapsedmethodist accuses Bock of anti-Semitism, while simultaneously accusing Limerick’s citizens of being bigots!

    Do you get really bad head-aches, lapsedmethodist?

  16.  

    what’s with all the f ‘n language? Getting it off your chest eh! Well, this list of parasites are mainly in their 50’s – 60’s and former ‘teachers’. Shit, they would have passed on their ethics to the 30 and 40 somethings! Coincidently the ones who were doing all the spending – and are now doing all the f ‘n and running. Ye were all misled were ye, Gobshites!! you lot played your part, grabbed every greasy cent you could (no doubt to spend on skinny lattes and fancy striped business suits – with pink ties) your heads were up your arses and now your backbone is like jelly. I’m glad I’m old, i’m happy to know I have a backbone. I saw what the Big boys in Europe had in store for Ireland, it was all about greed. I voted NO to Nice TWICE and NO to Lisbon TWICE. That’s when I realised this country was dead. Country didn’t matter, Constitution didn’t matter, (ask the president) ALL that matters here is the dosh. It’s the lining for striped suits, the confetti for celebrity weddings the stuffing for politicians mattresses. Oh, by the way, where exactly is the train, boat or plane taking you? it’s a global world, you voted for it and they’re all up the creek. Go home to your mammy you whinger – alternatively – you could grow a backbone and fight, if not for me or you, DO IT FOR YOUR CHILDREN.

  17.  

    Who’s us lot, Minnie?

  18.  

    Minnie, “it’s a global world, you voted for it “.. I don’t remember voting on that one? Was there some kind of memo I missed? Are you referring to the Lisbon and Nice Treatys.. I thought globalisation was there before those Treatys myself. I didn’t think anyone got asked to vote on globalisation. The Irish economy would be fucked (or f’d as you put it, reads the same!) without globalisation I would have thought. Not saying there aren’t cons aswell as pros.. but we can’t exist without having a free market. Never purchased foreign produce or goods yourself?
    How does one grow a backbone exactly? Do tell.

  19.  

    what about emigrations ?

  20.  

    Watch Gormley being interviewed. Cannot maintain eye contact with his interviewer for any length of time. Posibly the biggest bluffer/liar of the present bunch. Followed closely by Lenihan another smug prick who seems to have fooled many. His insincerety and obfuscation are being exposed slowly and surely. Aunty Mary and brother Conor have ensured that by their collective stupidity and incompetence the dynasty is near extinction and no fuckin harm

  21.  

    Ireland is a country that has ignored the suffering of those locked away for years in mental institutions how can this government claim any kind of pride in what they do?
    The Irish people need to get up off their knees and speak out for the victims who have been ignored in the Ryan Report, then and only then can some progress be made on the long road of compensating victims of Church and State.
    Doctor Rosaleen R

  22.  

    Hey Teachers! Leave the country and go!
    All in all, your just a… bunch of cunts in the Dail.

  23.  

    I’m a fucking gobshite. I actually was lured back to this fucking dump of a country after being away in the US for 12 years. No possible way of getting out of here now. Slave to the mortgage and all that bullshit. Probably couldnt sell my house. Cant believe I fell for all this shit and now have to look forward to my kids shagging off in a few years because these cunts fucked it all up for everyone.
    If anyone has any ideas of how to get out of this fucked up cuntry let me know……

  24.  

    Hey Murph, i really don`t think getting out is the answer. I could be wrong, but that is what the bastards who have fucked all this up want!.

    Why not adopt a different strategy, stay here and work to change the things that hurt, your kids leaving for one.

    Try to beat them at their own game.

    They work on the fact that you and others like you are despondent, are willing to give up and leave. It means they will always have some sort of control overall.
    The other thing they rely on is that old mentality ” if you can`t beat them join them ”

    I say who the fuck wants to join them, lets beat the shit out of them in a way they will never forget!

  25.  

    can somebody help me ive fell down that fuking hole again and i cant get back to teach my religion class!!

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