The Willipede

 Posted by on August 29, 2010
Aug 292010
 

Here’s a question for you.   What insect has a foot in every camp and an answer for every problem?  What crawling creature is everywhere and nowhere at the same time?  What bug has the habit of creeping inside your garden gate before you can stamp on it?

The answer of course, my friends, is the Willipede.  Able to hold a thousand contradictory opinions at the same time, depending on who it’s talking to.  500 of its legs are able to fill out planning applications that were going to be granted anyway.  200 of them are able to dial a Council official and get no answer.  120 of them can apply for old folks grants that were going to be approved anyway.  75 of them are able to shake hands with total strangers and claim credit for things they never did.  100 of them are able to stand outside count centres reminding people of the favours it didn’t do them.

That leaves five legs.

Two are for standing at the bar.  Two are for handing free drink to anyone who looks like a potential voter, and one is for scratching his arse when serious matters are at hand.

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  7 Responses to “The Willipede”

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  1.  

    I can see how emotionally attached you are to our bould pal Willy, such loyalty will be rewarded in the future. Ha Ha

  2.  

    Fucking tramp.

  3.  

    “Here’s a question for you. What insect has a foot in every camp and an answer for every problem? What crawling creature is everywhere and nowhere at the same time? What bug has the habit of creeping inside your garden gate before you can stamp on it?”

    The inscet that the people of Limerick will elect again?

  4.  

    Bock,

    Bravo.

    “What’ ya drinking?”

    “You know the strips on a (Celtic) Tiger are hard to change”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a4dSEyaT6R8

    What a fucking sorry sorry sorry State this is.

    And has been.

  5.  

    “According to Quantum Research, the failure of the authorities to prosecute such people cemented in the public’s mind the perception that there was one rule of law for the rich and another for the ordinary citizen.”

    Excuse me. Did we pay for Quantum Research?

    If we didn’t who did?

    Fianna Fail? Tony O’Reilly? Willie O’Dea?

    Who are these people?

    Who pays them?

    Does Tony O’Reilly pay Willie O’Dea?

    If so. Why?

    Who pays the PR Company that works for Fianna Fail?

    Do we?

    Does Tony O’Reilly?

  6.  

    What exactly is the deal between Willie O’Dea and the Sunday Independent?

    Come clean Willie.

    Are you being paid or is an advertising freebe?