Eminem Takes Over Efinef

 Posted by on January 27, 2011  Add comments
Jan 272011
 

Micheál Martin hasn’t yet seen a wet week as leader of the worst party this land has ever known, and already he’s as delusional as the very worst of Biffo.

Eminem has proposed a three-way debate between the leaders of the main parties, as he regards them, forgetting that he leads a party smaller than the National Weasel-Fanciers Association.

He didn’t want the Shinners involved, even though more members of the Irish electorate are likely to vote for them than for his own party, thus showing exactly what his democratic credentials are.

I don’t have much time for a political movement that still has TNT under its fingernails, but it’s a political reality that the Come-All-Ye Party might well be larger than Fianna Fáíl in the next Dáil. This isn’t something for SF to be proud of, but a measure of how abysmal Fianna Fáil’s behaviour has been, and at least I can say this for Gerry Adams: he’s able to talk in complete joined-up sentences.  I might not like the ideology, but I can still admire a politician capable of speaking, which is not something we’re used to in this country.

This reality has yet to dawn on Eminem, it seems.  And on Efinef.

They still think they matter.

Party workers on the ground are under no such illusions as they approach houses under cover of darkness to slip leaflets through letter-boxes.  I hear stocks of night-vision goggles have sold out in the army surplus stores.

On a personal level, I’m told Eminem is a decent enough fellow, and one of the more capable members of the Fianna Fáíl cabinet, but let me just pause there for a second while I stop laughing.

Capable? Fianna Fáil?  Cabinet?

No.  Sorry.  Just one more second.  Thanks, and sorry for the coughing.  Jesus Christ, sorry.  Fianna Fáil.  Capable.  Jesus that’s one of my best yet.

Eminem was one of the less incompetent ministers under Bert and Biff.  B&B.  I agreed with some  things he did, including his decision to visit Gaza and face down the Israeli blockade, but his obvious intelligence and principled approach to matters of importance simply confused me because I keep wondering how this ordinary human being could remain a senior member of the Troglodyte Party.

It’s a mystery.  Isn’t it, Toyah?

A mystery.

And now, witness the same intelligent, reasonably-decent man talking utter shite, as if his party has any relevance in post-crash Ireland.   As if he isn’t tainted by association with the crooks and the backhanders and the stroke-pullers.

As if the shattered and discredited rabble he leads have anything to offer in the world we face following Lenihan’s insane bank bailout.

Let me offer you a confession.   I like Micheál Martin as an individual.  I don’t like the organisation he heads, or the fact that he was an integral member of the cabinet that presided over a complete disaster, but I like him as a person.  I think he was one of the few in a cabinet of fools who had a clear insight.

On the other hand, Micheál Martin remained in cabinet when he knew that their decisions were unprincipled and cynical.

Therefore, by definition, he has no credibility as a politician and anyway he has no party, so what difference does it make?

I don’t know why people like Martin cling to outdated, superannuated concepts such as Fianna Fáil, or for that matter, Fine Gael.  Make no mistake, I don’t support the other side either.  I think both Civil War parties are equally irrelevant, and it’s about time they amalgamated to form a new, right-of centre party, taking the best from both of the old bullshit parties.  Meanwhile,. with a rejuvenated Labour and provided the Come-All-Ye Party has finally pissed on its hands enough to remove all traces of cordite, we might end up with a proper, grown-up, European political landscape.

I don’t know, and who does?  Strange days indeed.

  13 Responses to “Eminem Takes Over Efinef”

Comments (13)
  1.  

    Bock did you see this FFucking snivelling rat, Bertie, outside the Dail today…

  2.  

    Micheál Martin. Our very own Condoleezza Rice?

    Just not as good looking, well educated, musically talented, or fiscally astute.

    One thing they have in common, though, is a total lack of personal credibility by virtue of their association with discredited administrations.

  3.  

    He might be a good piano player.

  4.  

    Fianna Fail Nua already in a process of re-invention. Apologise first, throw a few grenades at the opposition about having numerous debates on TV in an attempt to isolate Inda, pick a new deputy head girl soon, muddy the waters, galavanise the half-witted footsoldiers of destiny and you’re back in the game.

  5.  

    MM is probably the best beginning FF could possibly hope for on their long road to rehabilitation. Is he big enough to purge the gombeens and attempt reform? It’s a tall order and probably too big for one individual. Having never voted FF (bar 8th preference) I do wish him well as at this remove he strikes me as having some personal integrity.

  6.  

    He strikes me as a typical arrogant opinionated F.F. prick with delusions of grandeur! “I shall set the agenda for the debates, and the other two shall fall in line like good little boys. Someone call the TV stations and inform them of my (or should that be our) decision.”

  7.  

    I’d say he’s good on the fiddle like all FFuckers.

  8.  

    Micheál Martin nice guy?

    They used to say the same about Bertie, remember?

    One doesn’t rise to the top of an organisation like Fianna Fáil by being a nice guy.

    Intelligent?

    In a way, I suppose. Micheál Martin has proved himself exceptionally good at soundbites, publicity stunts and moving on from government departments before the mess he left them in becomes publicly apparent and blamed on his successors.

    “Delusional” certainly.

    Micheál is introducing us to a whole new reality.

    This is a reality where somebody can be a member for 13 years of a government that destroyed the Irish economy and because he now says sorry we can all just “move on”.

    This is a reality where people like Micheál evade the consequences of their grossly destructive abuse of power – such as going to jail, for example – and instead seek election not just as an ordinary TD but as the leader of a political party.

    But then Fianna failures always claimed Fianna Fáil was more than a political party.

    They were right.

    It’s a hallucinogenic drug, the active ingredient of which is power.

    They need cold turkey and lots of it.

  9.  

    Hitler gone,replaced by Goerring. Viva la difference!
    Sorry Mickeen” lie” down with dogs and you`ll come up with fleas.
    Anybody know anything about Micks links to Owen O`Callaghan?

  10.  

    Whats with only ‘the three political parties’? Wasnt it that pack of spineless bastards the greens that kept that shower of gobshites in government through al the shennanigans? And I love the whole ‘we wont deal with Sinn Fein’ bullshit. Lets see how long that lasts? I bet FF would ride their own sister if they thought theyd get back in.

  11.  

    Debate? Is that what they think they’ll be doing? I dont know whether to laugh or cry.

  12.  

    So is anyone in Limerick going to run a “Don’t vote for Willie” campaign – it would shame the area if he got elected again.

  13.  

    Of course Willie will be re-elected. Even people who now do not want F.F. back in, they love Willie. He has been forgiven his” little mistake “ and is back in the inner circle.

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