You can’t beat a public school education. It makes you look credible even when you’re behaving like a complete tinker, as David Cameron is doing at the moment.
We would have – quite properly – laughed at a gobshite like Bertie Ahern, if we had caught him doing what Dave is up to, but much of our derision towards Ahern would have been driven by his cloddish manner and his complete lack of education.
Dave, who went to Oxford and obtained a very good degree, is far posher than Bert, who lied about going to the London School of Economics but might still perhaps be able to scratch an X on a rock with a piece of broken stone. That makes it all right, nearly, for Dave to be touring the Middle East, selling tasers to dictators. Well, no. It doesn’t make it all right. It doesn’t even make it less embarrassing. It just makes it less like Bertie Ahern.
No. That’s not true either. It’s exactly like something Bert would do. It’s just as crass as anything any idiot Irish politician would get up to, which proves that there’s no difference at all between the whole lot of them. Cameron is spending the next eight days touring Gulf states controlled by heartless despots, just as Libya burns and Egypt counts its dead after popular uprisings. Dave is going to Kuwait to sell them Eurofighters in case they need to machine-gun protesters from the air, like Gadaffi. At the same time, other British ministers are visiting a huge arms fair in Abu Dhabi, selling rubber bullets and tear-gas to tyrants.
Classy or what?
Dave continues his tour of the region, accompanied by British arms manufacturers, despite the wholesale slaughter of Libyan people, using British-supplied weapons. Although his people have hurriedly revoked arms licences to Libya and Bahrain, he still looks like a complete fucking knob-head.
But that’s not because of anything he did in government. It’s because he was born a knob-head.