Rory McIlroy — Irish Media Prefer Losers To Winners

Putting our worst foot forward

Rory McIlroy’s spectacular capitulation at The Masters on Sunday night reminds me of a brilliant Steely Dan number, Deacon Blues.

The song  is about the Demon Deacons, whose football team have the distinction of winning just 7 games from 1972-1975, including back-to-back 1-10 seasons.  During the same period Alabama were winning all round them.

However, the Demon Deacons got more media coverage because of their amazingly consistent losing streak.

Hence the chorus –

“They got a name for the winners in the world
And I want a name when I lose
They call Alabama the Crimson Tide
Call me Deacon Blues”

The song

McIlroy – leaving aside the fact that golf isn’t really a sport – fucked up good and proper as Renton said of Spud after the interview scene in Trainspotting –  in Augusta on Sunday.

The British golfer was leading by four strokes – I’ve no idea what that means. The only strokes I’m aware of are the ones pulled by Fianna Fáil – but then self destructed going down the final stretch.

One drive rebounded off the branch of a tree and wound up in the front garden of a house. The wheels came off the wagon big time from there on in and to cut a long story short he made a complete and utter bollocks of it.

Speaking of which. An American golf commentator, seeking to ingratiate himself with British and Irish audiences, was looking for some vernacular to go with his waffle for a big tournament in the UK a few years back.

He obviously spoke to the wrong people because when some golfer missed a relatively easy putt Leroy told an astonished TV audience.

“And he’s made a bollocks of it”…….

Meanwhile, back in Augusta, we were told that it was hard not to feel sympathy for Mcllroy. I don’t know about that.  I didn’t feel any sympathy for him.  If a herd of wildebeest had stampeded across the course it wouldn’t have cost me a thought.

However, despite his loss, McIlroy got maximum coverage on today’s papers. It will be even more craven tomorrow because Sunday’s 10:30pm deadline restricted today’s post mortems.

They had plenty of time for the purple prose today though. Likewise, expect reams of auld bollocks on Tuesday’s sports pages about this nonsense.

His capitulation is already being compared to Devon Loch’s collapse at  thr 1956 Grand National. The nag was just a couple of hundred yards from glory but splayed all over the turf. No one can remember the winner, only the loser.

Elsewhere on Sunday, our boxers claimed five gold medals from five finals at the Elite Gee Bee Multi-Nations in Helsinki. They also finished on top of the medals table and won the Boxer of the Tournament award and the best Technical Boxer of the Tournament award at the 15-nation event.

Forty eight hours before that the other Elite boxing squad won three gold and one silver at the Feliks Stamm Multi-Nations tournament in Warsaw. The IABA were using 13 Elite boxers in total at the two tournaments and they claimed eight gold, one silver and one bronze medal.

The boxing squad comprises World and European champions and Olympic medallists. They are our best hope for podium positions at the 30th Olympiad in London in 2012.

However, their  astonishing achievements in Helsinki and Warsaw were unrecognised in today’s broadsheets. One paper, shamefully, gave it no mention at all, while another squeezed in two paragraphs.  Another managed three paragraphs. Overhead all this winning – so distracting –  half a novel was dedicated to the loser in Georgia.

What sort of parallel universe are our sports editors living in that our world-class sportsmen, proven winners, get sparse coverage after hoovering up eight gold medals and a person who bottled it in Augusta is taking up half the page?

We had another example of this in the Irish Times late last year when the  swimmer Gráinne Murphy – she won one silver and one bronze in Europe – was selected as the Irish Sportswoman of the year.

But Katie Taylor, who claimed her third World title on the trot in Barbados last year – and her third European Union title in a row – and who was awarded the AIBA World female boxer of the year award, was overlooked.

How can an athlete who won two  non-gold medals in Europe be chosen ahead of an athlete who won her third World title in a row and was recognised as the best on the planet at what she does?

What sort of an  Ireland have we arrived at when we grant failure the oxygen of publicity and ignore our winners – not that Murphy is a loser.  She’s not, but she’s no Katie Taylor.

Maybe our Sports Editors like to paraphrase Steely Dan.

All together now.

“We’ve got no space for the winners in the world
But you’ll get a page if you lose.
They call our boxers  the Crimson Tide
Rory’s Deacon Blues”

19 thoughts on “Rory McIlroy — Irish Media Prefer Losers To Winners

  1. I’ve always wondered what the hell that song was about, thanks seconds. I assume the phenomenon you speak of is down to the fact that people with money are more likely to be interested in golf than boxing. Well the likes of the Irish Times anyway, would have a golf/rugby demographic. Did the tabloids lead with the golf too?

  2. Check out the definition of sport. Probably covers everything including golf. I dont see much difference between twenty two grown men trying to get a ball into a net and one grown man getting a ball into a hole.
    Add to that the throwing of a spear, roundy piece of metal, roundy flat piece of metal or just plain running beside somebody and trying to get to somewhere that little bit faster or for that matter trying to beat the shit out of somebody between some ropes.
    I know your post was not about the definition of sport. I wonder how many papers would have sold in Ireland on Monday morning with blanket coverage of the “astonishing achievements in Helsinki” and not the personal capitulation of one of the world’s richest golfers in one of the most watched sporting events on this planet.
    Im glad we are in an Ireland that can grant sympathy to a young man that tried and failed but had the intelligence afterwards to say that many people go through far worse things than playing a shit round of golf.

  3. Golf is as much of a sport as an overweight man chasing a rugby ball around a pitch. However, you could say how is golf a sport if the dress code is slacks and collars………..??? A lot of mental strength and technique required though…..

  4. Ring – no one is looking for blanket coverage of boxing on a Monday morn. I merely pointed out that they got no coverage at all in one paper, which is a disgrace. Boxing accepts its place in the scheme of things and makes do with being Ireland’s most succesful Olympic and international sport.

    Esso – As you point out, that’s they way of the IT. The tabloids are obsessed with football, but give decent space to the Noble Art. Back at the 2008 Olympics, when Ken Egan, the late Darren Sutherland and Paddy Barnes won Ireland’s only medals, the broadsheets were all over them like a bad suit. Same with Taylor to a big extent, but they then ignore the sport when it suits them. It’s a disgrace that five Elite boxers can win five gold medals, the best boxer and best technical boxer awards and finish on top of the medals table at one of the most prestigious Multi-Nations in the world and not get a mention in an Irish paper. – the BBC menioned the team concerned, but not certain Irish papers.GUBU.

    This is not only about boxing. All of the minority sports are suffering because of the obsessive coverage of the Premier League, Rugby, GAA and Golf. The space afforded to these sports needs to be culled to make space for more comprehensive coverage of Irish sport.

    Part of the problem with some Irish newspaper is that they’re tied to contracts with news agencies. They pay news agencies a fee every year and same provide coverage on a daily basis, a feed if you like, same with radio. This ensures that space is always filled. Having already paid for this service newspapers – because of cutbacks – will then use this copy they have already paid for and not use “indigenous sources, who they will have to pay.

    The radio feeds go out to hundreds of sources. It’s there at the press of a button if you pay for it. For instance a local radio station can announce – “now we go live to Old Trafford to for an update from the Evil Empire”. A skilful radio presenter can give the impression that the person providing the feed is speaking exclusively to his radio station, but he’s not. This live feed is going out to all their customers.

    Wrinkly Joe – my favourite football team is Prospect Priory. After I failed that medical with Deportivo de La Coruña they kindly offered me a three year contract – and some casual work in Donky Ford’s at the weekend.

  5. Ring Ouzel/Barry,

    Golf is a game, not a sport. Granted, it’s more similar to sport than say…poker, draughts or monopoly, but it’s about as physically strenuous as hop-scotch.

  6. True enough. Colin Montgomerie being a prime example of an “athlete”. However, would you think that being physically very fit pays off when it comes to the mental side of the game of golf?

  7. Being physically fit benefits the mental side of everything, including other sports like darts, poker, ludo and billiards.

  8. Spare a thought for the British boy people, when he tweeted yesterday morning that at least one of them – the winner and he share the same management company- had a green jacket ( the two were travelling to Malaysia in their own.private.fucking.jet).

    And Holly flew out to be with the young brit in his hour of need – to comfort him you know – like Paddy Eyepole did for me, when we last the junior cup in 1981 – that team of 43.

    Look , John Updike was a devotee but he played it and looked to deconstruct the dammed thing when he wrote brilliantly about it.

    I watched the azaleas a little last Sunday evening and credit where credit is due, Tiger’s not caddying anymore.

    Mr Out – the glaziers are happy cunts tonight – and baby lionel too .

  9. I was going to ask you the same question – who gonned the bateman?

    apparently, it might make an appearence in cork this sunday, when the beautiful take on the CCCs – bruff should send a cohort to forcibly take what is wonderfully and correctly theirs.

    and le pauvre geek – what did he bring home – a kiss from ken mcguiness ?

  10. yes bock – and young mr out can bing dora’s next generation of anglo-nubian too – they’re allowed into Charlies.

    didn’t bruff do brilliant and like mr out says, not much made out of it, and when you think about the scale – the enormity – the gigantic leap in effort, talent and determiniation from a small limerick town to produce the best rugby team in the land, well rory and his school blazer pales into the azeleas

  11. Such petty vitriol Seconds………. Firstly McIlroys nationality is his own business, I am sure the fact that he has represented Ireland many times in the past displeases many Free Staters.
    Without getting into subjective arguments as to whether boxing is a sport or not, maybe we Irish should thank Mrs Windsor when she comes to see us for the loan of many of her British boxers. Their numbers include Rinty Monaghan, Caldwell, Russell, McAuley, McGuigan, Duddy, Magee,McCloskey and Barnes.
    Did Ricky Ross plan for failure when he was naming his wee band?

  12. On the subject of, the Clones Cyclone reckons McCloskey Khan do the business Saturday night, if he avoids collateral damage in the earlier rounds.

    McCloskey, he’s in there with a shout, not like, unfortunately, Big Bang versus the Jackal.

    And I am gone very petty I notice.

  13. an american person clapped me on the back today, symphatizing with ” your boy” from last sunday evening’s farrago in augasta..

    i thanked him for his kind thoughts explaining they were unnecessary, as the boy was indeed british.

    from ennis , he said

    enniskillen, i said

    .( but that he was irish up to the 4th round )

    hey map, when liza gives back all the shit her da robbed, she can come back to mine for a cup of tea.

  14. Jesus Christ you people are whiny. I guess it sucks being irish.

    BTW, soccer isn’t a sport unless you’re American female or some sort of dirtbag third world mexican.

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