Jose Manuel Barroso must be pleased. Not only did Taoiseach Fido respond well to praise, but he also sat quietly on the Commission president’s lap throughout the press conference. Even when a stray bondholder ran through the crowd, chased by an Icelandic Hjalllkjaffjollkallkokutllhundur (thievingbankerbastardhound), Fido merely licked José’s Rolex.
I am very please that Ireland is make such good progress, said José. If Ireland continue to pay back debts of billionaire gamblers, we might allow them to borrow again in 2013.
That’s right, said Fido. We won’t be biting any bondholders. I got a special muzzle for Noonan.
Good boy, replied José, patting Fido on the toupée.
What about Anglo? asked one journalist. And Nationwide? They’re out of business but you’re still paying their bills.
Grrrr, said Fido.
My friend, smiled José, jerking on Fido’s chain. You see this dog? He is a blacksmith.
Some time he make a spring for you throat. Some time he make a spring for you balls. And then he make a bolt for the door.
Har har har, said Fido.
Here. Have this bone, muttered José. Good dog.