Not content with finding the Virgin Mary in a tree stump, they’ve now found Jesus in the Cliffs of Moher.
I kid you not. According to an Irish Central report, an American visitor, Sandra Clifford, 42, claims to have seen the face of Jesus on the sheer rock wall. Sandra’s picture shows a rock formation that, viewed from a certain angle, resembles a bearded man’s face.
Obviously, anything that looks like a bearded man must be Jesus. It couldn’t be, for example, Charlie Manson, could it?
Or even George Harrison?
How about Rasputin?
Not even Jimmy Cliff.
Nope. It has to be Jesus. We know what he looks like from the 2,000 year-old photographs taken by the police at his trial. And anyway, we have the testimony of Teresa O’Flaherty, who owns a local bar. According to Irish Central, Teresa describes her reaction to the picture thus: I was like, wow. This is a very common West Clare expression. I’m like, so totally, wow?
Ms Clifford claims to be a sceptic and therefore tested her observation by showing the picture to some German men, who nodded, as you would when some maniac is screaming at you on the edge of a cliff. But the absolutely conclusive evidence comes when you find out that she showed it to a young Asian girl who replied, inscrutably, Oh yeah, that’s cool.
Rock solid evidence, so to speak.
Jesus isn’t fussy about where he appears. He once appeared on a dog’s arse, and that’s because he wants to speak to all of us in a way we’ll understand.
The apparition on the cliffs is there so that American pilots will spot it. Yes, that’s right. I did say “pilot”. This woman flies aircraft, which, to me, is perhaps the most worrying part of the whole thing. What’s going to happen if the seer is at the controls of your flight?
Look! There’s Jesus in a cloud! Down there! Jesus in a field. See? Jesus in the ocean! I have an idea. Let’s all go to Jesus.
Excellent. Can we please have the name of the airline Sandra works for?
(Personally, I think it’s Bjorn Borg).
All posts on apparitions
Some more random bearded men.