Quinns Jailed — A Fistful of Euros

 Posted by on July 21, 2012  Add comments
Jul 212012
 

It’s hard to beat Country ‘n’ Western billionaires for entertainment, and it doesn’t get more C ‘n’ W than Fermanagh, home place of Seán and Peter Quinn, but the Deliverance theme has gone into overdrive with their latest caper.

What sort of shenanigans have the Quinns been up to at all?  As we speak, Seán Junior is lying on a bunk in his prison cell, staring at the ceiling and asking himself where it all went wrong.  I never done it, Sheriff.  I didn’t never do nothin’ to nobody.

Ok, Pete.   Tell it to the judge.

Meanwhile his cousin, Peter Darragh Quinn, is facing arrest once the posse finds him.  People less charitable would say he’s on the run from the law but let’s just say he’s incommunicado, and we’ll he might be since the judge issued a bench warrant for his arrest after he failed to turn up in court today.

The boys were caught trying to asset-strip what remained of their company’s value by hiding cash in dodgy Ukrainian shopping centre developments, and showed a very bad attitude when it came to complying with the court’s instructions, but that’s what you can expect from young fellas who grew up with a silver spoon up their arses.  Country ‘n’ Western billionaires are like that.

Seán Snr, once Ireland’s richest man, has been permitted to stay at large so that he can make arrangements to comply with the court’s instructions and return the €450 million he and the younger generation were trying to hide from IBRC (aka you and me).  This is in addition to the €2.5 billion that IBRC are trying to recover from the Quinn family.  The Quinns’ defence against this action is the most bizarre I ever heard, and it’s essentially this: since Anglo-Irish Bank illegally lent them the money to buy shares in the bank in an effort to fraudulently inflate the share value, they have no obligation to pay it back.

I’m still trying to figure that one out, but when I finally crack it, you’ll be the first to know.  Maybe if I send it to the Large Hadron Collider, they might bombard it with neutrons until it makes sense.

Anyway, Junior is in jail, pickin’ his banjo, blowin’ on his harmonica and a-listenin’ to the coyotes howlin’ at the moon.  Senior is begging a gang of grim-faced Russians to give the money back.  If he fails to convince them, Ms Justice Elizabeth Dunne will fling him in jail along with the young fella, and the cousin, if the Pinkerton agents ever track him down.

I wonder where young Peter is holed up?  Could it be in the Badlands of Monaghan, disguised as Big Tom or Declan Nerney?  Maybe he’s fixin’ to bust his cousin loose and go on a rampage across Cavan and Monaghan.  For all I know, he’s down in that there livery stable right now, with two fast horses, chewin’ a fat old cee-gar and linin’ up a stick of dynamite to toss at the jailhouse wall.

Sheriff, you better wake up that deppity o’ yours.  Looks like y’all could be a mite busy tonight.

  10 Responses to “Quinns Jailed — A Fistful of Euros”

Comments (10)
  1.  

    To repeat what I’ve said elsewhere on this: This is a pretty good deal for Sean Quinn.

    Firstly, while the idiot son is doing a bit of a wee stint, the majority of the interest and especially blame now shifts to the ambitious but ultimately expendable nephew. Peter Quinn was an eager and convenient lieutenant for Sean Quinn, but when the chips were down he was always last in line behind the true heirs, and would be expected to take the bullet for any and all of them when the chips were down. He just has.

    Quinn can now spend his freedom making half hearted attempts to get the money back from the Ukrainians—to no avail. “‘Twas all the nephew” Quinn will claim when the Russians run off with the cash, “Sure he was a terrible rogue altogether”. Meanwhile, the assets which popped up in the Quinn clan coffers during the boom will remain untouched and unquestioned.

    With the blame shifted to the “devious” and “scheming” fugitive, the idiot son’s idiocy will serve to exonerate him, and the sight of a poor wealthy son weeping away in Mountjoy will be enough to tugs the heart strings of every member of new-Ascendancy. He’ll be released in due course and the whole thing will be quietly forgotten. Quinn will put his newly gentled son in charge of some soft business or the other and he’ll be kept away from the families untouched fortunes, which will henceforth be administered by the more capable daughters.

    Peter Quinn will almost certainly turn up in the US, likely drinking Californian Red and eating crabs with David Drumm in Boston. No warrant will be issued. Peter will find a job with all the other boom-time exiles in the States, one of the lads again, in as much as they can be 3000 miles away. I’m sure every now and again his heart will pine for Ireland—in between speedboat races perhaps.

    Sean Quinn himself will survive this. He will not pay Anglo back much at all. In a few years, assets and funds will seem to almost appear by magic in his hands and I foresee Sean Quinn buying back Quinn Insurance, or why not, even Anglo or Nama themselves. Such is the rule of law in Ireland.

  2.  

    Yes Bock – it is different when you say they owe the money to us!
    Now, they’re akin to the enemy. Before, we thought that they must be brilliant business people.

    You remember when they were in the quarry business, and Sean issue a sort of challenge to Roadstone? That wasn’t easy back then.

    I heard since that Sean snr., did okay from the peace process if you can see that connection. If this lump of hearsay is correct, then the money came from England – not really us.

    It is a peculiar business. Whats in it for the Quinns to go to jail? What elaborate legal strategy must be underfoot? Perhaps it is reverse psychology and that Quinns legal team orchestrated this – by allowing your client to go to jail, then the legal system will seek the opposite as recourse? This is the stuff of “Rumpole of the Bailey”.

    And what is in it for the nephew to go underground? A quiet life, sure.
    This is new ground and I fail to see a reverse psychology angle here. Unless that being essentially self-banished, the Courts may order him to return home as recourse. – rather than ordering his arrest? Not really.

    I swear that I hated living through the celtic tiger – everyone was dumber than me and everyone was richer. Maybe Sean snr., would have been better off sticking to the concrete business, in Ireland only. Maybe his family would be better off if they drove forklifts in the quarry, rather than entering high finance and internationally at that. The nephew would be safe from himself, working in the quarry canteen with the exception of slipping on a banana skin – it happens in quarries as well as courtrooms!

    Ya, overalls may fit better on some people than others.
    And while you’re at it, you could measure up a few “clients” from Leinster House, for both overalls and canteen duties.

  3.  

    Great song.
    Superb version.

  4.  

    @OMF – “Californian Red” with crab? I think not. Probably a Sauvignon Blanc from Napa. Or at a push a Zinfandel. But red? Oh deary me.

    Someone needs to spend a little more time studying his wine!

    #CelticTigerInsults

  5.  

    And sensitive connoisseurs like the Quinns would be well aware of the difference.

  6.  

    What would happen if you drank red wine while eating crab? Flatulence?

  7.  

    There’s a good piece in today’s IT by Fintan O’Toole on the two tier prison system.

    Well worth a read. Not surprising, but it still makes you realise how deeply flawed our system is.

  8.  

    I’ve mixed views on sean Quinn. On one hand he employed a lot of people in a seriously depressed part of the country. On the other hand he was greedy beyond a level any of us could comprehend.

    The amount he bet on Anglo was staggering. Why did he bet the farm on anglo?

    He also has a track record when it comes to court cases. For example in 1998 or 1999 Mr Justice Quirke commented that Quinns “acted improperly and unlawfully” during its use of the planning process in a case where Quinn was found to have paid objectors to a rival plant tens of thousands of pounds. This portrays a character who doesn’t mind playing dirty.

    Can’t see him ever getting control of an insurance business again given the fact that he lost control of that business when he was found to be syphoning cash reserves in order to prop up his other businesses.

    On balance, i think he is more crook than local benefactor. Though in this country that seems rarely to be a disadvantage in politics, just ask the constituents of north tipp. Maybe he should run for office in Fermanagh or Cavan.

  9.  

    Thanks Seanie for putting an extra €50 on my Insurance Policy this year.

  10.  

    Oh the 50€ is only a drop in the ocean. The SBP reported recently that “secret” talk between Quinn and the state broke down recently. The state was looking for Quinn to drop the massive case against “Anglo” (us taxpayers) and Quinn was looking for the return of certain assets.

    I wonder were the talks broken off as a gamble that a more favourable regime would be in charge after the election, i.e. The Shinners.

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