Captain Janeway Says Sun Revolves Around Earth

Ah Kathryn, Kathryn.  What have you done to me?

Kathryn JanewayAfter all those years wandering the Delta Quadrant in Voyager, never giving up hope of a homecoming, with your scratchy voice and your grown-up hair-do, your iron-willed leadership in the face of apparently overwhelming odds, it seems you learned nothing.  How many solar systems have you navigated, fighting the Borg and the the dreaded Species 8472, humanising Seven of Nine, nurturing the Doctor as a living being, eating Neelix’s cooking?

Kathryn, I’m screaming.  You’re a Starfleet captain.  You know the earth orbits the fucking sun.  What is wrong with you?

What’s wrong with me, you might be wondering, and it’s this.  The vile, anti-Semitic Holocaust-denying anti-science bigot, Robert Sungenis, has funded a film undeserving of the title documentary, which tries to push the idea that the sun orbits the earth.

Now look.  I don’t care what sort of stupid ideas people want to believe, but when you mess with Star Trek, you mess with all off us, and when you hire Captain Janeway to do the narration, you’ve  crossed a line.

They might tell us that the voice is really actress Kate Mulgrew, but I soldiered with Janeway in the hard years of the Delta Quadrant, and I know what a fine officer she is, so therefore I retain hope.  Perhaps Janeway realises that the Sungenis are a horrible alien race.  Perhaps she’s infiltrated them, and in a final act of resistance, she’ll crash that ship right into the heart of their false sun.

At least, I hope so.  That’s what the Janeway I remember would do.





I knew Janeway wouldn’t be so silly.  Here’s the other side of the story.

3 thoughts on “Captain Janeway Says Sun Revolves Around Earth

  1. Considering the subject matter of this erudite gentleman’s upcoming motion picture, I rather like the fact that the first three letters of his surname are ‘Sun’.

    Is Kate Mulgrew a proponent of geocentrism herself, or is this simply an opportunity for her to earn a few dollars? Could be both, I suppose…

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