Everyone else will talk about honouring our maternal progenitrixes on Mothers’ Day, and good luck to them, but I just want to remind you of a class of mother that’s often overlooked when the flowers are handed out.
I’m, talking, of course, about the sort of mother who is always referred to in the singular.
One mean mother.
One tough mother.
One crazy mother.
This is the day when mean, tough and crazy mothers weep quietly to themselves because nobody thought of buying them a cheap bunch of daffodils in a filling-station forecourt. It’s tragic in so many ways. Mean, tough, crazy mothers who protect the world from Mexican drug-dealers, plane hijackers and international terrorists have feelings too, and so I thought maybe we could console them with a bit of music as they weep into their glasses of red-eye in some ungodly Interstate diner.
What better consolation than an entire album by the Mothers of Invention?
We could follow that with something from one talented mother, Paul Simon
And I thought we could wrap it up with a little ditty from a small but perfectly-formed sexy mother, but of course, no. TAFKAP doesn’t allow his stuff to be on Youtube, and who could blame him, I suppose?
Oh well. The mothers will just have to content themselves with this cover of Sexy Motherfucker.
To all those solitary mothers out there, I say, never stop being mean, tough, crazy or sexy.