Floating Shelf Design

Floating Shelf Design

Bock, said my friend.  I need shelves to go on the wall. Well, I said, you made a good start.  That’s usually where shelves go, apart from the last ones […]

Building a Kitchen

Building a Kitchen

In a petulant, and completely unreasonable, fit of pique I told Joe the builder to fuck off, and then I stood there looking at a half-completed kitchen and wondering what […]

When plans go wrong

I’m like a bastard at the moment. A headless bastard. I’m running around like a headless bastard with no purpose, no direction, no plan and of course, no head. Why? […]


After reading Mr Warmington’s charming piece on his Super Panther lawnmower, my conscience began to attack me, in a vaguely collapsed-Catholic kind of way. Look at that grass, Bock, it […]


I don’t know if I mentioned to you that I’ve been doing a bit of a job on the old house over the last while. Did I mention that? Maybe […]

I Hate Duncan Stewart

All home improvement programmes are terrible, but Irish ones just seem to go one step further in awfulness, for some reason, and I can’t figure out why. Is it because […]

Changing Mind (Ver 1.03)

I now have Kitchen 2.37 running well, and without too many bugs, though I still require a good number of plug-ins to complete the installation. Did I tell you I […]

Something revolting

This will disgust you, or at least I hope it will. It certainly disgusted me. With any luck, it might even make you vomit. Over the past few days, I’ve […]

Cookery matters

Cookery matters

Somebody asked me if I was going to christen the new kitchen, and I said, yes, I was going to call it “Dermot”. I think this has great possibilities, and […]


I seem to have been building this kitchen for about eighteen years now, and I don’t know when I’ll be finished. I’m hoping to have most of it complete within […]