Eminem Takes Over Efinef

Micheál Martin hasn’t yet seen a wet week as leader of the worst party this land has ever known, and already he’s as delusional as the very worst of Biffo.

Eminem has proposed a three-way debate between the leaders of the main parties, as he regards them, forgetting that he leads a party smaller than the National Weasel-Fanciers Association.

He didn’t want the Shinners involved, even though more members of the Irish electorate are likely to vote for them than for his own party, thus showing exactly what his democratic credentials are.

I don’t have much time for a political movement that still has TNT under its fingernails, but it’s a political reality that the Come-All-Ye Party might well be larger than Fianna Fáíl in the next Dáil. This isn’t something for SF to be proud of, but a measure of how abysmal Fianna Fáil’s behaviour has been, and at least I can say this for Gerry Adams: he’s able to talk in complete joined-up sentences.  I might not like the ideology, but I can still admire a politician capable of speaking, which is not something we’re used to in this country.

This reality has yet to dawn on Eminem, it seems.  And on Efinef.

They still think they matter.

Party workers on the ground are under no such illusions as they approach houses under cover of darkness to slip leaflets through letter-boxes.  I hear stocks of night-vision goggles have sold out in the army surplus stores.

On a personal level, I’m told Eminem is a decent enough fellow, and one of the more capable members of the Fianna Fáíl cabinet, but let me just pause there for a second while I stop laughing.

Capable? Fianna Fáil?  Cabinet?

No.  Sorry.  Just one more second.  Thanks, and sorry for the coughing.  Jesus Christ, sorry.  Fianna Fáil.  Capable.  Jesus that’s one of my best yet.

Eminem was one of the less incompetent ministers under Bert and Biff.  B&B.  I agreed with some  things he did, including his decision to visit Gaza and face down the Israeli blockade, but his obvious intelligence and principled approach to matters of importance simply confused me because I keep wondering how this ordinary human being could remain a senior member of the Troglodyte Party.

It’s a mystery.  Isn’t it, Toyah?

A mystery.

And now, witness the same intelligent, reasonably-decent man talking utter shite, as if his party has any relevance in post-crash Ireland.   As if he isn’t tainted by association with the crooks and the backhanders and the stroke-pullers.

As if the shattered and discredited rabble he leads have anything to offer in the world we face following Lenihan’s insane bank bailout.

Let me offer you a confession.   I like Micheál Martin as an individual.  I don’t like the organisation he heads, or the fact that he was an integral member of the cabinet that presided over a complete disaster, but I like him as a person.  I think he was one of the few in a cabinet of fools who had a clear insight.

On the other hand, Micheál Martin remained in cabinet when he knew that their decisions were unprincipled and cynical.

Therefore, by definition, he has no credibility as a politician and anyway he has no party, so what difference does it make?

I don’t know why people like Martin cling to outdated, superannuated concepts such as Fianna Fáil, or for that matter, Fine Gael.  Make no mistake, I don’t support the other side either.  I think both Civil War parties are equally irrelevant, and it’s about time they amalgamated to form a new, right-of centre party, taking the best from both of the old bullshit parties.  Meanwhile,. with a rejuvenated Labour and provided the Come-All-Ye Party has finally pissed on its hands enough to remove all traces of cordite, we might end up with a proper, grown-up, European political landscape.

I don’t know, and who does?  Strange days indeed.


Happy New Year

The time has come once again to wish Bock readers all the best.  God, is it nearly five years since starting this nonsense?  Hard to believe.

It’s been quite a year, hasn’t it?  Our half-witted government sold the country down the river and the Catholic clergy were shown to have covered up hundreds of crimes. The Murphy Report scandalised and shocked the nation with revelations about clerical abuse cover-ups while the economy continued to collapse under the misguidance of the two Brians.  As usual the non-fighting Irish stood back and took whatever was thrown at them but we tried to offer some hope. despite the IMF’s arrival.

This year, the Saville report on Bloody Sunday was published and Israeli soldiers killed 9 people on a ship trying to deliver humanitarian aid to Gaza.

A volcano went apeshit and a dipshit got drunk.  The dipshit’s government finally decided to scrap the moronic e-voting machines

Here in this town, we got a couple of great new gathering places and lost a micro-minister. A favourite music venue moved home.   We gained an excellent new market space but lost a dear friend.

Light-hearted posts turned into scientific debates.  Academics took huge exception to disrespectful remarks about post-modernism.  Other academics got very worked up about fruit-bat blow-jobs.

What well-known people died?  JD Salinger, Kate McGarrigle, Alex Higgins, Gerry Ryan and Bill McLaren.  Lots more too, but that was all anyone here wrote about.

Plenty others besides.  Have a glance through the archive if the mood takes you.  With any luck, we’ll be doing the same nonsense in the coming year.

All the very best for now.  See you on the other side.


Limerick Bands at Gig for Gaza

Here are some of the acts at the Gig for Gaza in Dolans Warehouse.  More to follow.


Limerick Gig for Gaza

Don’t forget.

Limerick gig for Gaza is in Dolans tomorrow, Sunday 7th November from 6 pm.

Be there.


Back on the horse

After four days of craziness, it’s time to get this thing rolling again.  There will be more craziness, as befitting the circumstances, but a little further below the horizon.

And what’s been going on in the wide world while we were all away grieving the loss of our friend?  Why, craziness, of course!

There’s Bertie Ahern, for instance, announcing to the Polish media that he wants to run for President.  It seems he has a lot of time on his hands these days, and a lot of time to think — which must be a new experience for Bert .  But what’s this about having a lot of spare time?  Last time I checked, he was a full-time member of parliament, paid a full-time wage to do a full-time job.  Has Bertie inadvertently let slip the secret we all knew  — that these TDs are sitting around scratching their arses most of the time?

What else?  Well, we now discover that Yehudi Lenihan was quietly slipping a few billion to Anglo’s bondholders while telling us how awful the condition of the country is.  And we find that the amount of money to be saved annually is now €15 billion, instead of the €7.5 billion Yehudi quoted. Why?  Because they got their guesswork wrong.  Lovely.

David Drumm, meanwhile, off over there in the United States, is filing for bankruptcy, and has to value all his assets.  How much does the little Drummer boy reckon his dog is worth?

A dollar.  That’s how much.

Or to put it another way, a dollar more than he values the lives of the people who have been ruined by his jiggery-pokery at Anglo.

I look forward to seeing an extradition application for Davey-Boy to come here and explain himself, preferably wearing an orange Baby-gro.

Meanwhile Mary Harridan had a bottle of red paint thrown at her by some Shinner woman, who should have a little insight into what it means to have blood on your hands.  But at least it gave us the wonderful picture of Mary, the grimmest of reapers, digging a hole while covered in red gore while wearing an unfortunate Morticia-style dress, though clearly not worn with the same panache as Mrs Addams.  The gloom without the style.

At a more local, and some would say parochial, level, we had the unedifying spectacle of a Limerick city councillor snarling at the visitors’ gallery, It’s our democracy, not your democracy.  I thought such an utterance from the this long-standing member was revealing of the sense of entitlement that pervades all elected representatives in this country.  In its own, mean-spirited, parish-pump way, it echoes the arrogance and hubris of the ministers in their Mercs.  The Gimme-People.

Extraordinarily, I imagine this city councillor would be quite unaware of anything wrong with his statement.

L’État c’est moi, he might say, though I doubt many of these buffoons would be familiar with the term.  But it’s what he meant in his own small —  very small — way.

It’s time to regroup in every sense and resume the fight against the forces of boredom, the ethics-free gobshites like Ahern and the imagination-free ideologues like Harridan.

I was chatting with a member of a well-known local band outside a popular hostelry the other night, and I asked him if they were going to play next Sunday’s Gaza gig, despite the loss of their gifted guitarist.

Time to get back up on the horse, he replied.

Indeed.  Precisely so, my friend.

Physical World

Killing Norwegian Eagles in Kerry

The recent TV documentary on the reintroduction of eagles into Irish society reminded me of the most bizarre story I’ve read this year.

A few months back the Norwegian Ambassador to Ireland, Öyvind Nordsletten, pleaded with the people of Kerry, politely mind you, to stop fucking killing their eagles.

As pleas go it caught the eye. It was a page stopper for readers as they say in the newspaper industry.

Norway flew the eagles (first class, Air France) to Ireland three years back for breeding purposes because birds of prey had become about as rare in Hibernia as an Anglo Irish Bank executive peering forlornly out of the back window of a Paddy Wagon, often referred to as a mother’s heart in Mexico City – because there’s always room for one more.

Up to 2007 the raptors, refered to as ‘iolaire sùil na grèine’ or eagle of the sunlit eye, were extinct on this island as they were hunted down, poisoned, shot and had their eggs stolen, in, you guessed it, Kerry, last century.

Leaving aside that Nordsletten may as well have been pleading with Hamas to build a synagogue on the Gaza Strip, the question remains. Why would anyone want to kill these magnificent creatures?

Most people accept that the golden eagle, the osprey, unless in Thomond Park, the white-tailed eagle, red kite and goshawk would be a most welcome introduction to any countryside.

The ultimate bird of prey, they swoop down on their quarry from altitude, like Roy Keane over Alfie Haaland, and snaffle him. They’re intelligent creatures also as their first instinct is to attack and pluck the eyes out of anyone involved with Fianna Fáil, Jedward, Boyzone, Westlife or Chris de Burger.

As said, most people are enthralled by iolaire sùil na grèine. However, in Kerry they have a different view of eagles and life in general. In the Kingdom, on spying an eagle, they find themselves overwhelmed with a sudden impulse to murder it.

So why would anyone want to kill the glorious Haliaeetus albicilla you ask. Freud, who had opinions on Paddy and his various eccentricities, might be the man to answer that. However, it is my view the above behaviour is the ultimate outcome of our ambiguous attitude toward first cousins sleeping with first cousins.

You can get away with this lark for a few generations but somewhere down the line a batch will emerge with that strange light in their eyes.

Moreover, this batch will want to settle in Kerry where they will be plagued with voices in their heads, and these voices, not unlike the voices Jack Nicholson was hearing in The Shining, will compel them to kill eagles – for no other reason than they exist – and to elect Jackie Healy-Rae & sons.

We saw an example of this slacked-jawed, craven ignorance in 2007 when the birds arrived in Ireland from Norway. Our feathered friends from the Land of the Midnight Sun were greeted with a lot of media interest on their return to our shores from their ten-decade exile.

However, around 100 farmers were protesting at their arrival at Kerry airport. I can understand protests at war criminals or Louis Walsh arriving in the country, but I ask you; what breed of arsehole would converge at an airport to protest at the arrival of eagle chicks?

Who organised the protest? How did they convince the farmers to march?. Were they handing out “Down with eagle chicks – they’re quare looking hawks” car stickers in Killarney? Honk your horn if you hate eagles – and that sort of thing.

Over the last three years at least 13 of the 55 eagles reintroduced into Ireland have been poisoned in the Kingdom. It is believed that one bird was shot in Northern Ireland – probably by a retired UDA or Provo type pining for the good old days when a man could lend a purpose to his life murdering Catholics and Protestants.

Meantime, south of the border down Kerry way, the farmers – tormented with those voices in their heads – had convinced themselves that the birds will attack their lambs. Some, outrageously, warned that the eagles will snatch babies from prams.

Ah yes, they’re terrors for snatching bairns from cradles are those Norwegians birds – and exposing themselves to elderly nuns.

Ireland is believed to have the lowest range of breeding birds of prey of all EU countries. During the 18th, 19th and 20th centuries most of our birds of prey were killed, mostly in Kerry, and became extinct around 1910.

The majority of the 55 birds introduced in 2007 have survived, thankfully. How much this has to do with the fact that the Gardai are now investigating the spate of poisonings is anyone’s guess.

Commentating on the eagle slayings, the Norwegian ambassador to Ireland said that he hopes that the poisoning will stop – diplomatic language for saying we are a shower of depraved trolls with no respect for man nor beast.

“We in Norway are deeply concerned about the situation and hope that all can be done to make such poisoning illegal. We hope that the unfortunate practice of poisoning will be ended so that this magnificent eagle, that we are very familiar with in Norway, can once again be part of the Irish landscape,” he said.

Maybe Nordsletten should travel down to Kerry to voice his protest in person. He’ll notice when he crosses the border into the county that all the radio stations, no matter how much you fiddle with the dial, are continuously playing the soundtrack from The Twilight Zone or Deliverance.

He’ll also notice that the eagles are soaring over Killarney National Park because the vast majority of people in the Kerry want to see these magnificent birds inhabit their landscape for the first time in a century.

However, there are a few in their midst spreading irrational fear and ignorance despite the fact that no lambs have been attacked by eagles since they arrived here in 2007.

RTE ran an excellent documentary of the White-tailed eagle, also known as the sea eagle, last week, but will they survive in the Kingdom or will a tiny minority of gombeens be allowed to disgrace us in front of the world once again?

Kerry – where eagles dare.


Limerick Gig For Gaza


What?  Fundraiser gig to raise money for another ship of relief supplies for Gaza.

Where? Dolans, Limerick.  Upstairs.

When?  Friday 29th October from 7pm.

Who? All sorts of interesting musical fuckers.

The event is organised by the Limerick branch of the Ireland-Palestine Solidarity Campaign who have established a Fundraising Committee for the Irish Ship to Gaza (ITSG).

The Second Freedom Flotilla to Gaza is set to take to the seas in November and will have between ten and fifteen ships trying to break the illegal Israeli blockade of Gaza.

Facebook page HERE.  Sign up.


Previously on Bock:


IDF Soldier Eden Abergil and “The Best Time of My Life”

Here are some of the pictures posted by former Israeli officer, Eden Abergil on Facebook.  Eden was posing with Palestinian civilians who had been arrested at a crossing between Gaza and Israel.

Comment is superfluous in this case.

The following comments appeared with this picture:

Adi Tal: “You’re the sexiest like that…”

Eden Abergil: “Yeah I know lol mummy what a day it was look how he completes my picture, I wonder if he’s got Facebook! I have to tag him in the picture! lol”

Shani Cohen: “LOL you psycho… I wonder who’s the photographerrrrr”

Shani Cohen: “Eden… he’s got a hard-on for you… lol for sure!!!”

Eden Abergil: Lol no honey he’s got a hard-on for youuu this is why you took that picture lol you took my picture!!!!”

LOL indeed.


Mavi Marmara Fake Auschwitz Video

Here’s a video of the Israeli navy speaking to the captain of the Mavi Marmara before intercepting it.

And here’s a fake of the same conversation, released on the IDF’s own blog, with voices crudely dubbed over a still of the video.  The clip purports to be a recording of the Mavi Marmara’s Turkish crew shouting (In English, with American accents) about Auschwitz and 9/11.

Comments on the Youtube clip and on the blog are disabled, presumably to prevent anyone pointing out the fake.

So here we have the Israeli Defence Forces apparently using the memory of Auschwitz to falsify a video associating the people on board the relief ship with Nazism.   If an Israeli institution is prepared to use the Holocaust this way, then nothing whatever that the IDF say about this incident can be believed.

If this turns out to be true, and on the face of it, I can’t think of a reasonable alternative explanation, then the IDF has lost all credibility.


Story repeated on the Jerusalem Post


Pictures of weapons found aboard the Mavi Marmara

I visited the Flickr page of the Israeli Foreign Ministry and downloaded these pictures of the weapons found aboard theMavi Marmara.

It’s a nasty-looking collection for sure and it explains why the Israeli commandos were so afraid for their lives.

For example, here’s a slingshot with the word Hizbullah written on it in English by somebody.  If you turned the other one over, it might say Down with Israel, Signed, the Terrorists.

Pretty damning, wouldn’t you say?  But not as damning as this maniac who speaks in white lettering printed on a photo.  Imagine if this guy ran up to you screaming.

Hold on a minute till I get my glasses.   Could you shout in a bigger font?

Then of course, there’s this very evil-looking guy with a forty-thieves knife, who kindly posed for the Israeli commando-photographer in front of a group of  clapping people.


Very evil and menacing, these Islamic types.

Here’s a picture of rioters initiating confrontation with soldiers who just happen to be innocently boarding the ship while armed with M16s and tear gas.  As with all rioters, this bunch are walking around the deck of their own ship in a clearly provocative manner, asking to be shot.

Apart from the Hizbullah slingshots, the rioters are armed with deadly bullet-proof vests.  They  try to kill the Israeli soldiers by wearing gas-masks and staring at them viciously through night-vision binoculars.



The terrorists are also armed with a deadly angle-grinder, which is an ideal weapon against soldiers when carried into battle along with a generator.  As the Israeli foreign ministry points out, the angle-grinder weapon was also used for cutting bits off the ship to attack the peace-loving soldiers.

Now that’s cunning.  The ship is really nothing more than a collection of iron bars welded together and ready to beat IDF personnel with.

Apart from that, the rioters had offensive Islamic, peace-hating pepper spray, quite unlike the calming, soothing tear-gas carried by the soldiers. As a further act of aggression, the terrorists provocatively left the spray cans in their wrappers, forcing the Israeli soldiers to shoot them.

This is true evil, but there’s worse.  The 600 anti-Israel terrorists also brought a clasp-knife with blood on it …

… and most tellingly of all, a collection of fire axes.  These terrorists came well prepared to fight the Israeli defence forces who are no match for  sling-shots, pepper spray, angle grinders, binoculars and axes.

Anyway, who ever heard of fire axes on a ship? Let’s get real.  I know international laws insist on ships carrying axes, but who obeys international laws?