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Religion World

Islam and Christianity Find Something in Common

I wrote a post called Islamic Savages a few days ago, and some people thought I shouldn’t.

Don’t know why.

Some people said I should write about George Bush instead, as if I’d never expressed a view about that warmongering cretin. As if, somehow, I’d strayed off their one, true, right-on fucking path. And you know something? It pissed me off.

You see, not only have I written constantly about America’s involvement in appalling activities around the world, but I have also comprehensively taken the piss out of the lunacies of Christianity. And still you have these people coming on here and saying Well, what about this, and what about fucking that?

Well, what about you fuck off if you don’t like it?

Do you know something? I couldn’t give a fuck. I’m no longer a Christian, if I ever was one, but I’m — I suppose — a collapsed Catholic, in the sense that I rejected all that nonsense when I was about eight years old. And by the way, if any of those critics think I didn’t write about Catholic savages, they haven’t read this site very deeply, but that’s another story.

Nevertheless, nutty and abusive as Christianity is, it moved on from its insane medieval phase where it believed in fucking murder. And that’s the big difference with Islam today. If I lived in the fourteenth century, and if there was electricity (other than static, just in case you feel like being a smart-ass tech-fucker), and if there was an interweb, I’d probably have been writing about Christian savages.

So. What do you make of these Islamic savages in Sudan?

A female teacher had a class of kids who all agreed that their teddy-bear mascot should be called Muhammad after one of the popular kids in the school. That teacher is now facing forty lashes for disrespecting the prophet. Arrested! And men are out in the street demanding this well-meaning woman’s execution for such a dreadful crime.

I’m sick of these hypocritical Islamic bastards. Fuck off the whole lot of them. They’re just the very same as the mad catholic priests of my childhood: they hate women. Why don’t they just fuck off and admit it? They’re demented. They’re sexually fucked up. They have a big psychiatric problem, all to do with sex, and they call it Islam.

For fucksake! How the fuck can these people expect to be taken seriously when they wander around the streets beating themselves on the forehead and demanding death to everyone they don’t like?
If their Prophet was around today to see how his followers are behaving, he’d rise up in disgust and cut the heads off the whole childish fucking lot of them.

Finally, Islam and Christianity are united: the words of both their prophets are defiled by stupid, mad bastards, led by frustrated sex-crazed hypocrite priests.

Common ground at last.