Scunts

I’m a bit worried about Scunthorpe United now, I have to tell you. They had two unfortunate draws in the last couple of weeks, throwing away four good points, and […]

Oh Yes, He’s the Great Zucchini

Bleat-Bleat!! Wha — ? Bleat-Bleat!! Ungnnhh? Bleat-Bleat!! I shook myself awake. What the – ? Had I been dreaming? No. It was Philip, my electric sheep-butler. It opened its jaw […]

For a few rupees more

For a few rupees more

What’s with all this effigy-burning in the Indian sub-continent? The last controversy I mentioned here was the Shilpa Shetty outcry in India which, you might remember, involved the famous Bollywood […]

Pakistan vs Ireland

Pakistan vs Ireland

Well, it’s hard to know where to go from here. You see, originally I was going to write about the reaction in Pakistan to the defeat of their cricket team […]

Trevor Brennan 3

Trevor Brennan 3

Well there you have it. Trev’s been banned for life. Personally, I don’t see why it’s such a terrible thing to be thumping unpleasant little prats who scream sectarian abuse […]

Off again

I had just fired my final Magnum 44 round at the last surviving critter and drained the last of the Wild Turkey when the phone rang. ring ring ring crash! […]

Ireland 19 - Scotland 18

Ireland 19 – Scotland 18

I was chatting to The Great Zucchini yesterday after the match. The Scots fucked us up, I said. We should have scored a bag of tries today. Yeah, he replied. […]

Scunts

Update. In case you missed it, Scunthorpe United are at present eight points clear of their nearest rivals, Bristol City, at the top of League One, and ten clear of […]

Scunts

Just to bring you up to date on the Scunthorpe United situation. Scunthorpe are now 9 points (that’s right: nine) clear of their nearest rivals at the top of the […]

My Plan for Ireland vs England

My Plan for Ireland vs England

I was in my study, contemplating the beingness of nothingness and slugging back a quiet whiskey when a powerful rumbling shook the Bockschloss to its foundations. What the- I ejaculated […]