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The Catechism of Blues

This is all about the blues. It’s an interactive post.  As contributions and corrections come in, the questions will be updated.

If you think I’ve made a mistake about anything, or left something out, let me know and I’ll fix it.




In Bluesworld …

When did you wake up? This morning.
Does anyone in Bluesworld wake up in the afternoon? No
What did you observe when you woke up? My Baby was gone.
What did you deduce from this observation? My Baby done me wrong.
This Baby is the same person as your woman? Correct.
How did your Baby depart? She up and gone.
Is it possible to have a good woman in Bluesworld? Yes.
Where does this good woman live? Way up town.
What does a good woman do for you? Treats me right.
What other sort of woman might one have? A mean woman.  A hardheaded woman.
What does a mean woman do to you? Brings me down.
What are the appropriate actions when your Baby done you wrong? I fall down on my knees and pray.
Anything else? I get myself a gun.
What do you do with this gun? I shoot my Baby.
In any particular way? I shoot her down.
Where? Down on the ground.
Is there any other form of homicide in Bluesworld? The electric chair.
How does one’s Baby take exercise? Running.
Where? All around town.
On her own? No.  With another man.
When one’s Baby does one wrong, what does one normally drink? Whiskey.
Anything else? No.
Beer? That’s Countryworld.
Banana Daiquiri? Where that gun?
Are any other beverages consumed in Bluesworld? Gin. Muddy water.
What is the principal activity of people in Bluesworld? Worryin’.
What do people eat in Bluesworld? Grits.  And chicken.
Where do people live? In a shotgun shack.
Where is this shack? Right outside town.
What town? Anyplace ending in Ville or Creek.  Clarksville, Jonesville, Brooksville.  Don’t make no nevermind.
What cities do Blues people live in? New Orleans.  Chicago.
Anywhere else? No.
How does one get to New Orleans? Ridin’ a rail-car.
How far does one ride the railcar? All the way.
What animals live in Bluesworld? Dogs.  Chickens.  Bullfrogs.
Anything else? Mules.
That’s it? Snakes,  catfish an’ flies a-buzzin’.
Catfish, you say.  Any other sort of fish? No.  Just catfish.
Not crawfish? That’s Countryworld.
Belugas? Trout?  Groupers? Where that gun?
How does one earn money in Bluesworld? Sweepin’ a bar or gamblin’.
Typically, how much money does an inhabitant of Bluesworld have? None.
What do you do for enjoyment? Boogie.
What is the normal duration of this boogie? All night long.
What instruments do people play? Old beat-up guitars and blues harps.
What’s the principal means of transport in Bluesworld? Railcar or hitchin a ride.  Cadillacs.
What sort of roads does one hitch a ride on? Dirt roads.
Is the misery unrelenting? Yes.
What sort of weather does Bluesworld have? Rain.  Lightnin’. Storms.
How does one have the Blues? So bad.
Do things ever get better? No.