Categories
Politics

Willie O’Dea does battle with Satan

Renowned local political exorcist, Willie O’Dea, took up the cause of a woman who was concerned about the PPS number containing the digits 666 which was issued to her new baby.

It was satanic, according to the mother, and Willie is famous for his opposition to Satan. Willie, in fact, is as hard on Satan as he is on Blueshirts and so, like the fearless parliamentarian he is, he took the matter to the Department of Social Protection.

Twice.

And twice, the Department told him to begone. A curse on your moustache, they said.

Undeterred, Willie the Exorcist decided there was nothing for it but to confront the Devil in his lair and so, deeming it to be a matter of national importance, he brought the question up in our national parliament. Could the Department please change the child’s PPS number because a woman in Limerick didn’t like to see 666 in it?

Eh, no, he was told. They don’t create designer numbers for neurotic nutflakes.

Defeated, Willie was forced to tell the distraught mother that her child would forever be marked with the digits of evil. Check his scalp, he advised.

The Forces of Darkness may have prevailed this time, but Willie will soon be back with a Baby Powers bottle full of holy water, a bag of crumbled communion hosts and an unshakeable belief that our national parliament is nothing more than a circus for clowns to cavort in.

How fortunate we are to have such a statesman representing us. As our country struggles through the worst depression in our history, we have Willie O’Dea to argue the case for a mother who doesn’t like a pattern of numbers.

And what’s wrong with that?

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Previously

Willie O’Dea takes on the Satanists

O’Dea backs humanist wedding ceremonies, draws line at Satanism

Categories
Politics

Affidavits, Damned Affidavits and Statistics

What an awful curse amnesia is, and how doubly-cursed Fianna Fáil is to suffer from so much of it.

Brian Lenihan Snr had a severe attack of it.  In May 1990,  he admitted to a researcher that he had tried improperly to influence the President’s decision on dissolving the Dáil.

Later that year, when he himself was a Presidential candidate, on “mature recollection” he remembered that what he had said in a taped interview was wrong.  He denied trying to influence the President, Patrick Hillery and tried unsuccessfully to meet Hillery and persuade him to back up the story.

In the resulting furore, under pressure from the small lapdog coalition party, the PDs, Charlie Haughey sacked his “friend of 30 years” from his ministerial post, and Lenihan’s presidential challenge was scuppered.

Lenihan and Haughey had little respect for the democratic workings of the country.  Lenihan once boasted on national television that he had offered a policeman a choice when he intruded in a pub serving drink after hours: have a pint or a transfer.  And everybody, including the Late Late Show host yukked.  What a hoot you are, Brian One law for Fianna Fáil and another for the rest of us.

During all this chicanery, Lenihan’s election agent was Bertie Ahern, a man who is no stranger to amnesia himself.  Ahern suffered from many bouts of amnesia during the Tribunal investigations, preventing him from answering crucial questions about his sources of money.

And now we have Willie O’Dea, whose case bears an eerie similiarity to the Lenihan affair of twenty years earlier.

There’s the affidavit, denying that he ever said anything defamatory.

There’s the inappropriate dealings with an institution of the State: the High Court.

There’s the sudden horrified retraction and improved recollection when confronted with the reality of journalist  Mike Dwane’s recording.

There’s the contempt for democracy displayed by O’Dea, his boss Cowen and his colleague, the minister for justice.  Anyone else swearing a false oath to the High Court would be facing charges, but Willie was able to claim that he made a mistake.

Not everybody yukked this time, but his friends and party colleagues did. What a hoot you are, Willie One law for Fianna Fáil and another for the rest of us.

In a final symmetry, it seems that Cowen will be forced to shaft his political buddy at  the insistence of the small lapdog coalition partner, the Greens.

What a pity the Green Party — now a party with no direction, no principles and no strategy — couldn’t manage one final act of redemption before it inevitably tears itself apart.  What a pity the Greens couldn’t grow a pair of organic balls and tear down this dreadful criminal conspiracy of a government that has destroyed our country.

Willie O’Dea is no doubt a cynic, a blusterer and a bully, but he’s only a symptom of the underlying infection.

Fianna Fáil is the abscess.  Willie is only the pimple.

Categories
Politics

Willie O’Dea’s West African Diamonds

The latest register of Dáil members’ interests has been published, and obviously you couldn’t but have a peek inside, could you?

Our local FF minister, Little Willie, has some intriguing shares:

(1) Ormond Mining: St. Canice St., Kilkenny: mining;

(2) African Diamonds: 162 Clontarf Road, Dublin 3: mining;

(3) West African Diamonds: 162 Clontarf Road, Dublin 3: mining;

(4) Persian Gold: 162 Clontarf Road, Dublin 3: mining;

(5) Formation Group: 162 Clontarf Road, Dublin 3: leisure;

(6) Pan Andean Ltd.: 162 Clontarf Road, Dublin 3: mining;

(7) Essentially Ltd.: Level 14, 89 Albert Embankment, London SE1 7TP: leisure.

West African Diamonds, by Jesus.  The ferret-faced little fecker digs in more interesting holes than I thought.

I wonder if there’s blood on those diamonds?

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UPDATE

I think this comment from Huron deserves to be in the main body of the post:

Question then to be asked is, is there any conflict of interest between Willie the Tash and John Teeling doing business? With Willie being minister of defence and Teeling doing business in areas that fell under UN troop protection are there more questions to be asked?

Who is John Teeling?
http://www.whartoncapetown08.com/bio-teeling.html
http://www.historycommons.org/entity.jsp?entity=john_teeling
http://www.tribune.ie/article/2000/jul/16/clontarf-raider/

What companies are at that address?

Irish Base Metals Ltd
Minco Ireland Limited
PRIORITY CONSTRUCTION GROUP LIMITED
ENNEX INTERNATIONAL PLC
All Financials Ltd
Formation Group
Priority Geotechnical Limited
Bec Priority Construction Ltd – Scetauroute
west african diamonds
PAN ANDEAN RESOURCES PLC
Cooley Distillery Plc
ADAM MILLAR & COMPANY LTD
IMAGINE TECHNOLOGIES LTD
Connemara Mining Company PLC
Petrel Resources plc
Technico Ltd.
African Gold
AER Limited (Cooley-Clearpower)
Persian Gold plc
Money Point – though it looks like they’ve moved out
at one point it looks like Tara Mines had an address there too.

http://business.timesonline.co.uk/tol/business/article1135653.ece
http://www.dublincity.ie/AnitePublicDocs/00226067.pdf – building plans
http://www.dublincity.ie/AnitePublicDocs/00226065.pdf – building plans

Categories
Politics

Gentlemen, Start Your Moustaches

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Credit for graphics as usual to the Dickler

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Categories
Politics

Willie O’Dea: Miniature for the Fence

Willie ODea, our Miniature for the Fence, got involved in an altercation at the weekend in South’s moral pub after watching a rugby match with Biffo Cowan.

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Somehow or other he got talking to some people who were upset at the fact that he didn’t do enough to prevent the loss of the Shannon-Heathrow link.

Willie seems to have lost his temper and made a complete tinker of himself, though he’s been frantically back-pedalling all day on the radio, sensing that this is going to make him look like an even bigger fool than his ridiculous moustache already manages to do.

I hear it went like this:

Willie: I’m the Minister for Defence

Man in pub: You didn’t do much of a job defending Shannon Airport.

Willie: Who’s this big prick?

Man in pub : My name is Fahy.

Willie: I’d like to thump you.

Man in pub: You and whose army?

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I’m guessing this is the start of the backlash against the Miniature for the Fence and before long the people of the Mid-West will rise up as one voter and dismiss him from office forever. Well, that’s unlikely, but a guy can fantasize surely? At the very least, they’ll hold him down and violently remove the ludicrous yard-brush he wears on his upper lip.

And he’ll deserve it, the absurd little popinjay.

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