Sometimes Mass Murder Is News and Sometimes It Isn’t

Did you see this guy’s video on the news?

He was as mad as a bag of spanners. A fruit. A complete nutcase.

I’ve been listening to the coverage since waking up this morning. Every station has it, on radio and tv. The world is shocked and horrified by the mass killings at the university, and quite rightly so.

This guy went out and deliberately killed 31 innocent people as well as taking his own life. Imagine: 31 people whose lives were full of possibilities until a suicidal maniac snuffed them out.

No wonder the world is convulsed with horror. No wonder the radio and television stations are full of it.


Meanwhile, in other news, 200 Iraqi civilians were killed by suicide bombers yesterday.

Not much about it on television.

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Bill O’Reilly

I’ve just watched Pat Kenny interviewing Bill O’Reilly, and I have to admit it isn’t really clear to me what just happened. Was that the finest piece of satire ever to appear on Irish television, or the worst example of scum-sucking obsequious arse-licking you’ve seen in your life?

Who’s Bill O’Reilly? Well, Bill is a big-time American broadcaster who thinks that killing 655,000 Iraqis is the best way to bring them freedom. Pat, on the other hand, is a small-time Irish broadcaster who maybe has his eye on greater things.

So back to the question. Interviewing Bill O’Reilly.

On the one hand you have a guy who thinks a chimp should be president of the USA, and on the other you have, well, Pat Kenny.

Great work Pat.

You fucking fool.


Jesus-lovin’ Commie-hatin’ Republicans

Check out this guy.

Shelley the Republican

A one-man sense-of-humour detector.

Favourites Humour

One man and his magnet

Some stories you just couldn’t make up.

Here’s an Iraqi guy going through security at Los Angeles airport when the alarm goes off.

Think about it. An Iraqi! At an airport! In America!!

Christ Almighty, if you were in that situation, wouldn’t you just shit yourself?

They jump on Fadhel al-Maliki. They wrestle him to the ground. They search him. They do the old rubber glove trick, and guess what they find?

Holy fuck! He has wires coming out of his arse. They dig deeper and they find that the wires are connected to something. Oh No! What is it? Has this crazy Iraqi guy got a bomb up his arse?

Well no, actually. It’s a magnet with wires coiled around it and a small, polished stone.


A magnet and a stone. The guy has a magnet and a stone shoved up his arse. With electric wires. Maliki told security staff that the objects were “therapeutic” and he went on to say that he forgot to remove them before going through security.

He was secreting these items in a body cavity and that was a great concern because there were also some electric wires associated with that body cavity, said Larry Fetters, security director for the Transportation Security Administration at the airport.

Now, there you are. You’re an Iraqi in America, which isn’t great to begin with. You’re shuffling towards airport security in a country where they think all Iraqis are terrorists. And you FORGET that you have electric wires coming out of your arse?

Mr Al-Maliki, 35, of Atlantic City, N.J., was held for a mental evaluation and for a possible immigration violation, federal officials said.

Really? I wonder why?

This guy has to be a clear contender for the Darwin Awards, but he wasn’t charged.

Politics war World

Henry Rollins Writes to Laura Bush


Trócaire ad banned

What about the good old Broadcasting Commission of Ireland, huh? Now there’s a fearless watchdog working to keep Ireland a better place, wouldn’t you think?

I was especially taken by the BCI’s latest spectacular, where they banned an ad from the charity, Trócaire.

You might have seen it. It’s about the appalling treatment of women in the “developing” world, as people sometimes call it. The ad shows dozens of babies and a voiceover explains that they were born with something more prevalent than AIDS, or cancer or HIV: they’re female. It explains how, in some parts of the world, they’ll be subjected to circumcision, murder and sexual slavery. It urges our government to take action on these issues and asks people to be aware of what’s going on.

What’s wrong with that, you might be asking? What’s wrong with making our government sign a treaty condemning such awful practices? Well, according to the Broadcasting Commission of Ireland, you can’t do that. You can’t have an ad like this because it’s – go on, guess. Yep, it’s political! You see, we have a law here in this country that forbids the broadcast of ads on political matters or religion. It’s a good law, and it’s designed to keep demagogues and God-maniacs out of our faces. But unfortunately, we also have civil servants who are in thrall to the new spurious God of Political Correctness, and that’s why you can’t have an ad protesting about rape, murder, female circumcision and oppression. That’s politics, according to the BCI.

How about that now?

Imagine if we were back in the Forties, but with television. Here comes an ad showing bulldozers pushing mountains of corpses into a pit at Auschwitz, Treblinka or Sachsenhausen. Outraged, you put out an ad : down with this sort of thing.

Nah! Sorry, says the BCI. Too political. You can’t do it, sorry, it’s politics.

There you are with your camera in Cambodia. The Khmer Rouge are herding the entire population of Phnom Penh out into the fields to be slaughtered.

This is fucking awful, says you. I must tell the world.

Next thing you know, here’s a civil servant from the BCI. Aodhogán Ó Fruallacháin, let’s say, or some other Irish-Civil-Servanty type name. I’m afraid not. Under section 11(5)(b)(iii) of the Act, this is clearly a political advertisement, and we cannot permit its broadcast. A Chara.

I see. What a tremendous sense of overview these BCI people have. How committed to their brief, come what may.

Giant civil-servant-eating aliens’ mothership hovers above the Department for Banning TV Ads. Maybe I could put out an ad warning people not to help the aliens because they want to devour the whole planet when they’ve finished the civil servants?

Eh, no. Sorry. Eh, ’tis politics, ya see. Can’t allow it. Eh, no. A chara.

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popular culture

Feck off, foreign beggars!

These days, you can’t walk down the street without some foreign fucker looking for money.

I was in Cruise’s Street during the week and this guy with a deeply impressive moustache was directing maybe five or six women and some children where to sit. Different positions up and down the street. They had paper cups to hold out.

You could see that the guy was a serious businessman by the meticulous way he arranged his collectors, and I had to admire that in him, though it was the only thing admirable about the prick. I’m not sure yet what the difference is between this guy and a pimp, as I don’t know what his relationship is with the women, though the body language suggested a relationship of fear.

Now, what about our own beggars? What about the irritating fuckers you used to say fuck off to? Are they out of a job?

Give us a few bob and I’ll say a prayer for ya, Sir.

Is that finished? What a pity.

That’s the European Union for you.

New beggars that you don’t know. Give our beggars back their jobs, that’s what I say.

Favourites Politics

Stock Market Collapse

What about all this talk of the stock market? There’s no escaping it, is there?

Turn on your radio, and there will be somebody explaining that the trend in share values is downwards. There’s a surge in the Japanese Yen. Interest rates are going up. America is heading for a recession.

Listen to the way they talk about it. You’d swear they were meteorologists studying the weather. You’d suppose they might be cosmologists gaping at the nameless abyss of the galaxies. You’d imagine they were discussing some immutable natural force, bound by the laws of physics and chemistry, united by the eternal subtle and beautiful language of mathematics. That’s what you’d imagine, isn’t it, if you listened to these economists. The natural order. The power of the Universe. Truth.

But it’s not. It isn’t the weather. It isn’t gravitation. It’s not spiral nebulae swirling their relativistic ever-expanding dance across the void.

What drives these rates up and down, what makes the Yen surge or the dollar recede, what brings poverty to Africa and smaller houses to Europe is not some profound, primeval and pristine law of nature. Newton wrote no Principia in its honour and conceived no calculus to describe it. Nor did Leibnitz. Einstein wrote no coda to the music of either.

It isn’t Nature that changes share values. It isn’t physics, nor chemistry, nor even the strange underlying chaos that dances beneath everything.

It’s greed.

It’s fear.

It’s war.

And most of all, it’s stupidity. The stupidity of mankind, which no science can explain.

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Limerick Music Politics popular culture Venues

Bodies in bodybags

There’s a fine songwriter here in this town who’s been writing songs for a hundred years, and I’m glad to include him among my friends. Eamonn Hehir is his name, and he’s been producing stuff for years that pissed off the establishment.

But the latest one really seems to have hit a nerve.

Bodies in Bodybags just doesn’t cut it with Limerick 95 FM, it seems. Especially the version released by Siobhan O Brien. Too controversial, apparently, for Radio Smalltown. Why? Well, for one thing, they’re sending these soldiers out through our local airport and Limerick 95 FM wouldn’t want to upset the Americans. But apart from that, you can’t have songs about people getting killed. No. Definitely not. You can’t have these kind of songs. Oh God no. And particularly not if the people are getting killed because Dubya said so. Oh Jesus, no. You couldn’t have that on the radio.

Here’s a clip. Bodies in Bodybags

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Dubya debates with himself

This from Wrinkly Joe: